Tag: twitter

PistoriusBalls 18

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Summing up, and thus we’re getting towards pretty much the last chance for the journos in the court to come up with The Quote or The Soundbite which will be The Title of The Book about The Trial.

On Nel’s Effects:

The BBC have gone with “Mosaic”:

Sky, with “Snowball”:


And SA’s ECR with “Domino”:

 

Meanwhile, back in 1994:

 

The competition as to who will be the first to tweet the tea break announcement is as tight as ev… oh, no, it’s reigning champion Andrew Harding as usual:

 

And this simply can’t be true.
I’m pretty sure the judge would not allow him to do either of these things in court:

“Mr Nel, would you please keep your voice down and remove yourself from that state witness.
At once!”

AP ‘crash lands’ missing comma error

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Punctuation matters: punctuation, matters.

The official Associated Press twitter account just tweeted this:

ap1

to their 3.54 million followers, when what they actually meant was this:

Dutch military plane [comma] carrying bodies from Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 crash [comma] lands in Eindhoven.

Thanks to Jonathan Hitchcock (see comments)

Someone then realised that the missing punctuation gave the sentence a wholly different meaning, and quickly (9 minutes quickly) issued a clarification:

ap2

Which itself is hardly an example of perfect punctuation either.

PistoriusBalls 15

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Day 24 and an unexpected change of tack.
We’re now working from the ‘Eye For An Eye’ School of Justice Manual…

bbmurder

Got to suggest that this is premeditated, right?

 

Are you watching, students of the noble art? THIS. IS. JOURNALISM!  

 

Meanwhile, talking of “journalism”, new levels of desperation have been reached on News24:

psit2
Look out for their exclusive Pistorius headline tomorrow: “There Were A Few More People Here Than Yesterday, However Their Numbers Still Didn’t Really Match Up With The Larger Amount Of Observers Which We Noted Earlier In The Week, But Was Obviously Greater In Number Than Last Thursday, Which Was Notable For The Fact The The Courtroom Was Surprisingly Sparsely Attended”

 

You’re imagining Barry Roux winking at you?
I dunno. Is there such a thing as demob desperate?
Lest we forget, you were imagining his opponent half naked on a tropical beach paradise just yesterday (see above).

 

Really, Andrew? Is this honestly your understanding of what someone would do were their opponent to bring a comb to a knife fight? “Jab at his qualifications and credibility”?
‘Cos I’d guess that they’d probably just stab him. Unpleasant? Sure. But let’s face it, it’s a knife fight and he’s turned up with a comb. What does he expect? His qualifications and credibility to be jabbed at?
I doubt that very much.
No, I think that with your remark, you may be confusing ‘a knife fight’ with ‘a qualifications and credibility jabbing session’ and they’re really not the same thing, their only common factor being that I wouldn’t bring a comb along to either occasion.

 

And then that was it. For a couple of weeks, at least.

WANT MOAR BALLS? PistoriusBalls Archive.

PistoriusBalls 14

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Day Twenty-something and we’re still trying to knock off before 3pm…

Mmm. People jam is my favourite, just ahead of Strawberry, and Fig.

 

Sadly not. I can still see you.

 

Come on, people. This is very disappointing. It’s almost as if Reeva died in vain.

 

No idea. Have you tried the Asian percussion section in your local music shop?

 

Strange decision. Is the courtroom busy or something?
Oh God… will it be televised? 🙁