Day 334 – Crooked

Not a post about our erstwhile government.

But yes, Chesterfield does have a church with a crooked spire.

It’s quite a thing.

You drive right past it on the A61 when you’re heading to Sheffield because you’ve taken junction 29 off the M1 North in an effort to avoid the Catcliffe Link and the city centre traffic (and that’s really the only reason that you’d be in Chesterfield).

The spire was added in the 14th-century tower in about 1362, and is 228 feet (69 m) high from the ground. It is both twisted and leaning, twisting 45 degrees and leaning 9 ft 6 in (2.9 m) from its true centre. The leaning characteristic was initially suspected to be the result of the absence of skilled craftsmen (the Black Death had been gone only twelve years before the spire’s completion), insufficient cross bracing, and the use of unseasoned timber.

It is now believed that the twisting of the spire was caused by the lead that covers the spire. The lead causes this twisting phenomenon, because when the sun shines during the day the south side of the tower heats up, causing the lead there to expand at a greater rate than that of the north side of the tower, resulting in unequal expansion and contraction. This was compounded by the weight of the lead (approximately 33 tonnes) which the spire’s bracing was not originally designed to bear.

There are around a hundred twisted spires on churches across Europe, but this is the only one that you’d be likely to be passing if you were on your way to Sheffield

Day 333 – 1984

If you choose to believe some people, we are currently living in 1984 – not the year (some of us have been through that already) – the George Orwell novel in which the population is controlled by Big Brother and the totalitarian state.

Get a grip. It’s just a bit of cloth on your face.

But what really happened in 1984 – not the George Orwell novel in which the population is controlled by Big Brother and the totalitarian state – the year?

Well, talking of totalitarian states (eh?) there was a by-election in Chesterfield and there were 17 candidates. By law, if you mention one of them (and clearly, Moira Stewart had done so), you also have to mention all of the others so as not to show any sort of bias.

So Moira: take us through the other names, if you would, please?

Ah, democracy.

Of course, none of these individuals came close to challenging the big three, and Labour’s Anthony Neil Wedgwood… er… “Tony” Benn romped home with 24,633 votes, much to the chagrin of John Connell of the Peace Party who came in 17th, just 24,626 behind.

So close.

Day 328 – Terrifying electrics

Look, I don’t want to go too much into this right now, but the electrics around this place have got me rather concerned. Some of the light fittings seem to have come from the 1950s (note that the house was built in the early 80s, although that doesn’t preclude some of the light fittings being from the 1950s, I suppose). Some of the wiring also appears to have come from that time.

Or earlier.

The previous occupants also had a thing for downlighters. Each of them with a 50W bulb in.
And there are so many of them! Like literally 60-odd in the whole property.
I’ve been doing some rudimentary calculations, and I’ve worked out that we simply can’t afford that sort of electricity bill. And so the long, slow, ‘spensive process of replacing them all with sensible LEDs begins now. Well, not now. It’s half past nine at night. So “just now”.

Yeah. Pretty much later. (But not later tonight.)


StudyWatch: Still peach.

Day 316 – Things I’m not doing tomorrow

[Update: What happened next? See this post for details.]


Number 1 – Going to this:

Where. To. Begin.

Yes: THE ENGLISH IS TERRIBLE: a split infinitive, a missing hyphen, a couple of AWOL commas and an embarrassing speling eror.

But that’s not the reason that I’m writing this post.
“Dr” Chabad (de Jaeger) de la Fontaine is the reason I’m writing this post.

“Dr” Chabad (de Jaeger) de la Fontaine was the lady who became briefly and locally famous after the Muizenberg beach protests last week. Here she is:

…making claims that she is:

“…a very highly skilled medical doctor, as well as a virologist, immunologist and quantum physicist, working with parasites that they call viruses.”

Look, we’ve all been there, but this is really is no way to publicly describe your colleagues.

Still, it’s an impressive array of qualifications and specialisations, and one that – if you do a bit of background reading on “Dr” Chabad (de Jaeger) de la Fontaine – seems to vary depending on the day of the week and the direction of the breeze.

The flyer above (as you can read) suggests her qualifications and specialties as:

MbCHb, Naturopath, Homeopath, Quantum Physicist, DNA Nutrition, and Permaculture.

Gotta keep that DNA nutrified.

…while LinkedIn says she is a:

Naturopath, Homeopath and Quantum Nano Technology Researcher with “expertise in water, blood, salt, origin of humanity, genetics and DNA”, whose “deep intuition is extra-ordinary.

and she is also the owner of “Aqua Resonance Technology Ltd”, which according to the CIPC, doesn’t exist.

But elsewhere, we learn that she is also “Founding Member (and Human Intelligence Self- Mastery Consultant/Coach/Trainer) @ Changing Lifestyles (Pty) Ltd”, which according to the CIPC, er… also  doesn’t exist.

And she’s also been “Executive Assistant to CEO @ AFRO SYNERGY TOURS (Pty) Ltd”, which according to the CIPC… ag… look, you can probably guess.

Still, maybe it’s a quantum physics thing and these enterprises simply exist in a parallel universe, reality or timeline. Or maybe the CIPC has got it nailed and they don’t exist full stop.

We just don’t know.

What we do know is that (according to “Dr” Chabad (de Jaeger) de la Fontaine), “Dr” Chabad (de Jaeger) de la Fontaine can do


and is a networker in advertising and promotional products:

I mean, I find it a bit strange that after her weirdly capitalised MbCHb, which must have taken an absolute minimum of six years to achieve, she has never chosen to mention it before anywhere that I can find, but I’m sure that’s just an oversight.

In fact, the highest qualification that I can find on any of her myriad profiles suggests that she has a Masters degree, listed thus:

Master’s Degree, Quantum Physics, Haemotology and Nutrition for Blood Types @ Private Tutor From 1980 to 1988

Three of my four PhDs in apparently randomly contrived subjects also came from Private Tutor, so that all seems legit and completely above board.

Elsewhere on that page, she claims to have spent 16 months as a:

Senior Researcher @ Scientific research on water oscillation, frequency and resonance technology

which seems an awful long time to be doing senior research at scientific research on something that doesn’t exist. Especially when you’re a qualified medical doctor.

In fact, that particular profile (written at the end of 2015) doesn’t actually mention that she is a qualified medical doctor at all, but I’m sure that’s just an oversight. It does tell us that she worked to try and get a new modular furniture system business up and running, and has a diploma in Event Management from Damelin College in 1994 though, which pretty much adds up to about the same thing, I guess.

A minor point: The HPCSA doesn’t list her as a medical doctor either. Odd.
But I’m sure that’s just an oversight.

Anyway, tomorrow, as you will see, she’d like us to spend 3½ hours with her beyond the lentil curtain as she demands “TRUTH OVER LIES”, and transparency around the qualifications of those “advising the president of the replublic [sic] of South Africa”.

Yes. I’m all for clarity around the qualifications of these so-called ‘experts’ telling us how we should be living our lives.

Still, I won’t be going.