AppealBalls 1

Do you remember the now infamous PistoriusBalls series? Some people thought it was all over, and it was then. But suddenly the State decided that actually, possibly, maybe they could swing a murder verdict, and thus there was an appeal. And with that appeal…. came AppealBalls!

Step forward… Alex Crawford, *polite applause* with her astute observation:

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Well, quite astute observation…

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Dude looks like a Lady! Except… you know, the other way around.

Also back… please welcome… Aislinn Laing! *rapturous cheering*

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This tweet works best if you embellish it just  a little and imagine it being said in a 1940’s New York private detective voice:

The doll was in the restroom when he filled her full of lead. Pistorius was once famous in South Africa for his athletic prowess. Now it’s for a devastating criminal act. I don’t usually take cases involving famous people. No private eye needs that kinda attention. But line him up in front of the district attorney and a stenographer and he could soon make dusty case law.

Mandy’s still around, too:

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Or what gender they identify as, hey Alex?

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Thanks be to she who invokes Homer Simpson. Because yes, it’s definitely time for a beer.

PistoriusBalls Special

Sentencing is complete and I was going to let it lie, but this just cried out for PistoriusBalls recognition and seemed a fitting way to end the series.

Important information. Great counting. Unique angle.

PistoriusBalls Gold.

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I’m no expert in the forced removal of judicial buildings, but I think that this is somewhat unlikely. And with the court still firmly in place, there’s even time during a murder trial for a whimsical reference to that cookbook:

But there’s good news from Andrew Harding:

Meanwhile, Wayne Derman says you need a dollop of butter in that. Probably.      

So many meanings we could read into this. But I think it’s just that Lucy wants to get home before 3Talk with Noeleen begins.

Of course she does, because we should never – NEVER – underestimate the travails of the courtroom journalist:

Also there are communal showers. And each evening you have to sleep with 65 TB-riddled criminals. Or something…

The prison reference? Yes, it is.


So you can choose your own teatime tomorrow… Enjoy!

REMEMBER: You can see the full PistoriusBalls series by clicking here.

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Day 24 and an unexpected change of tack.
We’re now working from the ‘Eye For An Eye’ School of Justice Manual…


Got to suggest that this is premeditated, right?


Are you watching, students of the noble art? THIS. IS. JOURNALISM!  


Meanwhile, talking of “journalism”, new levels of desperation have been reached on News24:

Look out for their exclusive Pistorius headline tomorrow: “There Were A Few More People Here Than Yesterday, However Their Numbers Still Didn’t Really Match Up With The Larger Amount Of Observers Which We Noted Earlier In The Week, But Was Obviously Greater In Number Than Last Thursday, Which Was Notable For The Fact The The Courtroom Was Surprisingly Sparsely Attended”


You’re imagining Barry Roux winking at you?
I dunno. Is there such a thing as demob desperate?
Lest we forget, you were imagining his opponent half naked on a tropical beach paradise just yesterday (see above).


Really, Andrew? Is this honestly your understanding of what someone would do were their opponent to bring a comb to a knife fight? “Jab at his qualifications and credibility”?
‘Cos I’d guess that they’d probably just stab him. Unpleasant? Sure. But let’s face it, it’s a knife fight and he’s turned up with a comb. What does he expect? His qualifications and credibility to be jabbed at?
I doubt that very much.
No, I think that with your remark, you may be confusing ‘a knife fight’ with ‘a qualifications and credibility jabbing session’ and they’re really not the same thing, their only common factor being that I wouldn’t bring a comb along to either occasion.


And then that was it. For a couple of weeks, at least.

WANT MOAR BALLS? PistoriusBalls Archive.

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Day Twenty-something and we’re still trying to knock off before 3pm…

Mmm. People jam is my favourite, just ahead of Strawberry, and Fig.


Sadly not. I can still see you.


Come on, people. This is very disappointing. It’s almost as if Reeva died in vain.


No idea. Have you tried the Asian percussion section in your local music shop?


Strange decision. Is the courtroom busy or something?
Oh God… will it be televised? 🙁