Category: this is south africa

Away

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Tethered (not in a 50 Shades… way) to my tablet’s tenuous internet connection, I thought I should fire off a quick missive from the cottage. For the record, let it be known that I am quite, quite drunk and I am listening to T’Pau’s first (only?) album.
We drove down in the new car; and what fun. So much of power.

It’s been a day dominated by the wind – a gale force north westerly hangover from last night’s cold front, but I’ve still been up a ladder in the lee of the cottage, removing dead birds and living plants from the gutter. My life is so glamorous.

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A quick visit to the beach, a couple of beers, a braai and a rather decent Cabernet Sauvignon from 2007 and I’m now sitting in front of a cosy log fire.

Life could be worse…

Swimming Pool Hippo Is Dead

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Just for the sake of completeness, and somewhat belatedly (I’ve been busy doing life), a quick update on the state of the hippo which got stranded in a swimming pool in Nylstroom.
Actually, the title of the post may have rather given the game away already.

The hippo is dead.

“Solly” was doomed as soon as people got all soppy over his plight and gave him a name, thus immediately humanising him and making it far more emotionally draining for all concerned when he popped his clogs. Questions have to be asked as to whether he would have survived if the vet hired to tranquilise him hadn’t arrived four hours late, but they won’t be asked, because we have far more important questions to be asked.

Questions like:

Who on earth is going to go and stay at the Monate Game Lodge near Modimolle, when their pool looks like this?

(and I’m not talking about the 1 ton of Hippopotamus amphibius therein.)

Fortunately, due to draconian export legislation, we have a surfeit of swimming pool cleaning apparatus here in South Africa and I’m quite sure they will constantly get stuck in one corner clean all that hippo crap out in no time at all.

Long weekend ahead

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It’s holiday time in the Western Cape on Monday, at least according to the ANC Youth League.

“We are officially declaring Monday a holiday for Western Cape’s citizens. No work as we make this city ungovernable. No taxis will be in operation; those who will be on the road will be transporting people to the march… for free” said the league’s provincial chairman, Khaya Yozi.

Now, whether you agree with Yozi’s plan or not, I think we can all something learn from his announcement.

It seems to me that there should be less working and more holidays on Mondays. Coming from the UK, I’m used to having public holidays on Mondays – the holidays for May Day, Whitsuntide and August Bank Holiday always fall on a Monday, making for lovely long weekends in the rain. Compare that with a normal Monday in SA, where you’ll find us all slaving away inside while the sun beams down outside.

But not on this coming Monday, obviously. Because this coming Monday is a holiday. I think that Yozi has missed a trick by arranging to meet at Salt River Station – on the edge of Cape Town’s fetid industrial heartland – and not at the beach. I will probably try out that latter option and then get back to him to compare notes on how much fun we had.

Additionally, should my Monday plan go well, I will be declaring Monday September 3rd a holiday as well. But we’ll definitely meet at the beach. In fact, as summer approaches, I foresee myself declaring a whole lot more public holidays. Especially on Mondays.

Have a wonderful long weekend and I hope that you can all find something profitable and enjoyable to do with your free time, such as stoning vehicles on the freeways and causing R13,000,000 of damage to public property.

Meanwhile, in Nylstroom…

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(…which is actually now called Modimolle): Please excuse the poor English. Yes, there is a hippopotamus trapped in a swimming pool in Limpopo. And no, this never used to happen in Sheffield. UPDATE: Not to be outdone, the DA in Cape Town has revealed that it’s not just ANC-controlled municipalities that have hippo issues:

Residents in Zeekoevlei, in Cape Town, have been asked to keep a look-out for a renagade young hippopotamus which is popping up in gardens and roads after moving into a lake there. City officials are hoping the 2-year-old calf will return back to its pod after appearing in an unfenced reserve following the theft of part of the boundary fence in the neighbouring water body where it lives.

It’s almost African…