Yep. The problem with writing bullshit is that when the bullshit that you’ve written turns out to be bullshit, people can go back and read it, and see just how wrong you were.
And lets face it, this one was spectacularly incorrect.
Using the… er… internet, I discovered that James Chapman now heads up a PR Agency (motto: “Build. Protect. Repair.”) in Westminster (of course he does), alongside James Henderson, who used to be CEO of Bell Pottinger until 2017.
As you will read:
Until September 2017, James was the CEO of Bell Pottinger, where he developed the agency into an integrated multi discipline communications business offering financial, corporate, litigation, crisis, regulatory, political, brand, digital, and personal reputation advice.
In 2016, Bell Pottinger had revenues of £35 million, 8 offices globally and over 250 employees.
It pains me to have to post stuff like this. It’s just simple common sense. Of course they do.
And yet…
This is quite clearly BS, and if you need to be told that it’s BS, you probably also need to seek professional help.
Yes, the UK switched on a coal-fired power station a few weeks ago. No, it wasn’t because solar panels stopped working.
…liberal-minded news outlets like The Guardian blamed maintenance at nuclear plants in Scotland and inter-tie maintenance on an undersea cable from Norway.
And much as I’m no fan of the Guardian, oddly on this occasion, it turns out that they were far more likely to be correct than those making the assertion that it got too warm for PV panels to work properly.
They’re built to function from -40C to +85C. Performance does fall when temperatures go above 25C, but only by 0.34 per cent for every additional degree. That’s pretty marginal stuff, according to Solar Energy UK. Even at close to boiling point, power output would only be around 20 per cent lower it says, other factors being equal.
“It’s not actually a big deal. High temperatures only marginally affect the overall output of solar power – it’s a secondary effect” says the UK’s leading technical expert on the technology, Alastair Buckley, Professor of Organic Electronics at the University of Sheffield.
Yet another example of someone who read something on Facebook believing that they now hold the same expertise as someone who has been studying the subject for their whole academic career.
It got up to a whole 30C, which is hot for the UK in June, but isn’t really hot when you compare it to the rest of the world. If this temperature had really wiped out the UK’s solar energy production, then basically, no country within a band 50 degrees north to 50 degrees south would be able to utilise solar panels.
Add in the countries north and south of there that can’t use solar because there isn’t enough sun (a genuine concern in placed like Svalbard) and suddenly that’s basically the whole world.
So why would any columnist try to paint this clearly incorrect picture, seemingly in a bid to discredit renewable energy?
Well, I guess it depends on the columnist:
Shaun Polczer is the Business Reporter for the Western Standard, based in Calgary. Formerly, a business reporter for the Calgary Herald, he has also held senior positions at the Daily Oil Bulletin, and the London Petroleum Economist.
Oh.
Sadly, the comments beneath his piece (I’m not giving him any extra traffic by linking to it), tend to suggest that the ability to think rationally and critically might also have been knocked out by the heatwave.
Next week: Why do ice skates not work in the cold?
…it’s likely that – with the exception of sharing photographs on Instagram (more on that tomorrow) – I’ll probably not be on social media very much. Yes, maybe the occasional delve in just to check that there’s nothing that I’m missing, but generally, I’m hoping to be looking less at screens and more at real life.
I’m going to try and get through this post without using the adjectives “upmarket” or “leafy”. Wish me luck.
We all want to live in an upmarket, leafy [bugger] suburb, and so there’s always a bit of suburb creep, probably begun by crafty estate agents, but then happily perpetuated and propagated by residents and businesses who are trying to add a bit more class to their address by placing it somewhere nicer than it is – at least in nomenclature.
Apparently, Constantia is one of the nicest places to live in Cape Town. Well, that is when Bulgarian gangsters aren’t being murdered there. But that aside, it is generally very pleasant. But not everywhere is in Constantia – and that’s a problem. Thankfully it’s one easily solved by just lobbing the word “Constantia” onto the beginning or end of your business name.
You might have thought that it ended there. Because it probably should have done. But no.
Builders Warehouse in Retreat got in on the act, calling itself “Constantiaberg” after the mountain on the far side of Constantia from Builders Warehouse (but yes, in the background of the picture on their Google profile).
Constantia Online listed Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens under “Fun Things To Do In Constantia”.
One of our friends who absolutely lives and works in Tokai has her business listed as being in Constantia. Awkward.
Reddam House school in which used to be in Tokai or Westlake or Steenberg is now in Constantia. The school itself hasn’t moved an inch: incredibly, Constantia came to meet it. And Constantia came to meet it simply because Tokai or Westlake or Steenberg weren’t posh enough and so Reddam pretended that their school was in Constantia.
And it’s that entitled, privileged, posh-end kind of business, ignoring the rules of society like they do so very often, that has pushed Constantia way north of where Constantia actually is, as well. Recently, Claremont BMW – in… er… Claremont, very much at least a Wynberg and a Kenilworth Upper (as well as quite a lot of a Claremont) away from Constantia – rebranded as… You guessed it:
Just for the record: this, while delightfully suiting the aims and narrative of this blog post, really is a massive stretch.
I do recall using a map on that last post about this phenomenon, but I can’t use that again, because this example doesn’t even come close to fitting on it. So here’s a new map.
Incredibly, that’s 11.23km from top to bottom. Or from bottom to top. It doesn’t matter which way you go. Ignore all the other suburbs you are clearly passing through. You’re in Constantia, all the way.
This northerly movement of Constantia – this Conspansion – now means that ironically, Bishopscourt – arguably a posher, upmarketer, leafier suburb than even Constantia – is also now in Constantia. Which must be a bit of a downer for the residents there.
We also now live in Constantia, and eventually, so will you. Everything will eventually be in Constantia.
Conspansion is continuing, and there’s nothing you can do about it.
But I was reminded this lunchtime that to merely limit the frame of reference for crappy service to South Africa is exceptionalism of the highest order.
Because while Mrs 6000 was once again chasing a UK bank over a UK credit card that should have been delivered to a UK address two weeks ago – NOT EXACTLY ROCKET SCIENCE – I got an email from a foreign airline.
Some context: We’ve never used this airline before, and it’s one that I would rather not be using now, but because of reasons, we’re going to be using them in the very near future. And everything – everything – as is the way these days, is done through their app.
Fine. I’ll download your app.
And things were great, until one day, the OTP that I needed to log into their app didn’t get sent. Not by email, not by SMS. And now, it never gets sent. So since then, I haven’t been able to log in to the app or their “desktop site”, and thus I can’t do anything on there like confirming flights or checking in or booking seats or meals or… well… actually anything.
(And yes, it’s the correct cell number and it’s the correct email address. It used to work, and now it doesn’t, and I tried to create a new account and they told me that my number is already registered.)
And so I emailed them yesterday.
And they emailed me back today, the notification of a new mail arriving just audible over my wife’s international seething from the kitchen.
Here’s what the email said:
[Unfeasibly long string of numbers and letters] Dear Mr 6000 This is in reference to your email dated 12th September 2022.
wut? when now?
We apologize for any inconvenience caused to you while trying to log into your account. Our colleagues in the Privilege Club Team will be in a better position to assist you.
Cool. Thanks.
For any queries/assistance, you can login to your Privilege Club account and raise a service request online or log in through mobile app and look for the Online Assistance tab.
Oh. Silly me. I hadn’t realised that it would be so straightforward. Sure, I’ll just log in to my account so that I can fill in a form telling you that I can’t log into my account.
I’ve said it before and I will now say it again: THESE PEOPLE WALK AMONG US.
Are you ready for the kicker, though? The final insult?
Thank you for writing to us, we appreciate the opportunity to respond to you.
Oh, I bet you do. It’s really a very good job that this wasn’t a face to face discussion.
