Category: uk

Just Dorset things

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We all like to live in nice houses. Or churches.

And we all differ in what special touches we apply to our houses to make them stand out from the crowd.

I’m not sure we’d all go for this sort of thing, though:

Dorset is weird.

Oh. Hang on.

Apparently, it’s not for interior design. It’s an annual community occasion:

She said: “What happens is we get these poo fountains shooting up in the street and in people’s houses. It’s becoming an annual event.”

“People need to take notice of this because we’ve got more housing coming along and Dorset Council has made this a development area.”

Like the church fete or some Morris dancing. Everyone can join in. Candy floss, ice cream vans, a coconut shy and some poo fountains. Lovely.

All the fun of the fair.
Yeah. Dorset is weird.

What a difference a week made…

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…168 little hours.

[with apologies to Dinah Washington]

March 8th 2026: Don’t send warships.

March 14th 2026: Send warships.

Flip flopping like a fish out of water. And hopefully expiring just as quickly.

I’m no big fan of Iran or their leadership, and no big fan of the UK PM either*, but I’m right with Starmer on his stance on this issue so far. Just as Iran has gradually isolated itself from its neighbours, so Trump is now doing exactly the same with the US’s allies. And I’m glad that so many leaders are showing him a diplomatic middle finger and choosing not to be a contributor in this unholy mess he’s made and continues to make.

The sad thing is that this is a global issue. No matter whether you choose to support the Israeli and US action in the Middle East or you choose to condemn it (or anywhere in between), we’re all affected by the decisions of this dementia-ridden bag of poorly painted skin.

And never in a good way.

.

* There are levels here, obviously.

“Gutted that they’re moving”

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Spotted on an estate agent site in the UK, this property in Kent.

Ah yes, you can tell that the owner is a real “character”, can’t you?


Exactly the sort of person you want next door.

And if you thought that the front was bad (because it is), then just check out the back garden.

Ugh. Imagine opening your bedroom curtains to that each morning. Take it somewhere out of sight.

I’m sure that their neighbours are all absolutely gutted that they’re moving.

Another one

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One of the spin-offs of religion dying out in the UK (and in a lot of other places too) is fewer muppets. And that’s great.

But another spin-off is old, no longer required church buildings being converted into residential accommodation.

Like this one from a few weeks ago.

And this one, which I saw today.

Looks like a church. Was a church. Now a house. With a Tower Bar.

It’s what Jesus would have wanted.

Again, there is the modern interior design, sitting somewhat incongruously within the original church walls:

And the windows that are just too big for the bedrooms:

Says the blurb:

The best feature of the entire property has to be the glass walkway with glass flooring looking down over the living room providing access to the mezzanine area which is currently setup as a spectacular cinema room with 8 electric leather reclining chairs and a projector screen that comes down over the stained glass window making this a very special place to watch tv or movies.

And they’re not wrong. It does look a bit wow:

R27 million in today’s local money. Which seems like a lot (because it is), but you do get a whole church and “a stunning Victorian orangery with rainwater storage and paved flooring which makes this a special place to relax and unwind.”

Fair point. I can never truly be at peace in an orangery that doesn’t have rainwater storage and paved flooring.

This beautiful church is also only about an hour’s drive from Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane, where Sheffield United relegated Sheffield Wednesday to League One yesterday afternoon.

Glorious.

Bye!

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Any football news from Up North today?

Only this:

Not the 20-0 rout that some foolish people were predicting. It was never going to be like that.

But the history books will record that Wednesday were relegated at Bramall Lane, and that’s what really matters. The three points are also very welcome, but Derby days are all about beating your rivals, and to send them on their way to League One…

…well, that was just the icing on the cake.

Incidentally… recent local derbies have been won by Us (obviously), Liverpool, ManU, Arsenal and Sunderland.

Red is clearly the colour of local dominance.