If this isn’t on the tip of people’s tongues yet (spoiler: it is), I have a feeling it soon will (should?) be:

Fullscreen capture 2016-02-09 041041 PM.bmp

And with the State Of The Nation Address just around the corner (literally and figuratively), we might be able to see the second part of the definition demonstrated on Thursday evening as well.

Double whammy!

Fikile – u ok hon?

Here’s a statement by our erstwhile Sports Minister, Fikile Mbalula over the weekend:

fm statement

and here’s a letter which has popped into the public domain this morning:

fifa letter

Of course, even though the $10 million payment was made to Jack Warner, it wasn’t a bribe, in the same way that that body of water at Nkandla isn’t meant for any purpose other than fighting fires.

And if it was a bribe, why would they have made that huge PR effort and the big song and dance about such a generous donation to such a worthy cause?

Nah, this totally seems legit.

“It hasn’t featured outside of SA”

One of my Facebook friends (peace be upon them) had shared this News24 piece, replete with The Arch being more Tut Tut than Tutu over the recently delivered Nkandla report (featured here) and suggesting that the government had “humiliated SA”.
At least, the Facebook friend suggested, it is:

Good to know someone respected world-wide is on the side of the “average” SA citizen.

And, I suppose it is.

But then there was this comment in reply*:

It hasn’t featured outside of SA once again. Zuma doesn’t give a monkeys because Zuma is well aware of the fact that International media have wiped their hands of SA.

“It hasn’t featured outside of SA”? Really?

Apart then, from er… the BBC:

South Africa’s ‘brazen cover-up’ of Zuma’s home upgrade

And The Sydney Morning Herald (and with it, The Brisbane Times, Western Australia Today (good news for those in Perth), The Age and The Canberra Times):

‘The pool is for fire safety’ and other Jacob Zuma renovation excuses

Sans oublier RFI – ‘Les Voix Du Monde’:

Ceux-ci ont estimé que le rapport du ministre de la Police est « biaisé » et inconstitutionnel, puisqu’il ne prend pas en compte les recommandations de la médiatrice de la République.

Of course, the fugly (but sadly, well read) Daily Mail didn’t miss out:

South Africa’s president has been cleared over using £15million of public cash to add a swimming pool and visitor’s centre to him home because the new features are actually security measures.

Elsewhere in the UK, The Daily Telegraph:

Police claimed expensive swimming pool was necessary in the event of putting out a fire on his sprawling taxpayer-funded estate

While the Middle East was covered by The Gulf Times:

Police Minister Nkosinathi Nhleko said on Thursday that an investigation found that the president is not liable to repay any of the public funds spent as the improvements were in fact security features.

I could continue, but I think I’ve already shown that the allegation that SA has dodged an international news bullet simply by the president being routinely crap is, at best, misplaced. Zuma et al. don’t give a monkeys not because they think their actions will avoid international exposure, but simply because they have gone beyond the point of caring what people think of them.

Because, as I mentioned in that post last week:

We seem to have crossed yet another line of pisstakery with today’s events.

It seems hard to believe that Zuma and his cronies are capable of anything more ridiculous than we saw last week. However, having said that, ironically, we had said that previously and yet they continue to confound us and outdo themselves time and time again.

But that “it hasn’t featured outside of SA” line?
No. The damage is still being done with every step of breathtaking hubris.

* I’m choosing to ignore the grammatical disaster of the gratuitous “of”.

Jerm’s Zuma the Gaul cartoon is very clever

Here’s Jerm’s cartoon for today, on the subject of our esteemed leader and his taxpayer funded security complex:


Nicely done, and plenty of food for thought in the comparisons between the current situation in Nkandla and the last of the Gauls hanging on against all the odds in the face of  the overwhelming might of the Roman Empire.

I wonder what Zuma’s Getafix (Mac Maharaj?) has been giving him to make him think that he’s going to get away with this? (Although much like Asterix and crew, I have a sneaky feeling that he actually is going to get away with this.)

Infamy, infamy!

They’ve all got it in for me. (with apologies to Frankie Howerd)

Well, JZ isn’t going to be happy anyway after my tweet appeared in today’s Mail & Guardian:

The story itself makes pretty horrendous reading, so maybe you shouldn’t.

For those outside the Republic or who have chosen not to follow the Nkandlagate thing (some people can only handle one big news story at a time and it has recently been announced that Justin Bieber is coming to SA), my tweet refers to the fact that JZ’s smart KZN pad stands on land owned by the Ingonyama Trust, the body that administers Zulu tribal land. The trust has confirmed that Zuma holds a formal lease on the portion underneath his compound, but does not hold the title deed; a fact relevant because banks generally refuse to issue loans to finance properties on such land.

I’m well aware that explaining the reasoning behind a joke immediately removes any lasting element of humour from it.