Prefect end to the year

Last day of Term 4.
Therefore the last day of the 2022 school year.
The ceremonial switching off of the 6am alarm on the phone.
Prizegiving, and a goodbye to the headteacher of 19 years.
Some great results, and that prefect announcement.
Celebrating with a family meal out tonight (while our home sits in darkness).
And why not, given that there’s lots to celebrate and there’s the 2000-2230 slot for the next couple of evenings, and then an “are you actually f_____g kidding me” 1800-2230 on Sunday?

At least we won’t be able to watch Carte Blanche.

Why didn’t he ask before?

10 hours without power today. If only something could be done about it.

But… wait…

JUST IN: The Minister of Public Enterprises, Pravin Gordhan, has directed the
management and board to work hard to get the country out of stage 6
loadshedding with immediate effect.

Oh. Well then.

I never realised it was that straightforward.

Why didn’t he just ask a bit earlier?

If you thought that today was bad…

…with its Stage 6 loadshedding and consequent 10 (TEN) hours without power – then you’d be absolutely right. Let’s not allow ourselves to normalise this sort of crap.

But then, if you’re in my zone, you probably don’t want to look at tomorrow, where there’s another ten hours, including the top two worst loadshedding slots.

Argh.

I saw someone the other day wondering when we would all start “posing the awkward question” (their words, not mine) as to why with so little electricity flowing on a daily basis, our bills haven’t dropped at all. Oooh! Tasty stuff, invoking all sorts of conspiracy theories.

Except…

Our bill has dropped loads. I buy the same amount of electricity every month and I usually/often (not sure which is the better word here) have to top it up by the end of the month. November’s lot is still going and we’re on the 7th December! And what’s more, we’ll make it to the 10th with what we’ve still got left (and well beyond, if we stick at Stage 6 for the next few days).

Some disclaimery:

  • Yes, I’d absolutely rather have power 24/7.
  • No, you don’t get completely free pass when the power goes out, because you need to heat water up and cool fridges down when it comes back on.
  • Yes, November is a warmer month, so there’s no heating required (such as we have heating anyway) and the ambient water temperature is warmer, so the same amount of electricity might go further.

    But still, even with those provisos in place, I’m getting at least 33% more than I usually do.

    And you have to take the small wins, because the big defeats are regular, they’re heavy and they’re depressing.

    Anyway, suddenly I have loads to fit in – including some depression – before the next outage at 2pm, so please excuse me.

    The Top 3 Worst Loadshedding Slots

    Yes, all of loadshedding is annoying, but as George Orwell once stated:

    Some slots are more annoying than others.

    An amazingly prescient (and suspiciously specific) man.

    Anyone who has experienced rolling blackouts will be in agreement with this and, since several (or more) of the Northern Hemisphere countries are about to give it a go, I thought I’d warn my readers up there about which slots are really going to get their blood boiling (on a hand-lit gas stove, rather than in a kettle, obviously).

    Here in SA, our loadshedding slots last for two hours followed by a half hour (dis)grace period for the power to be reinstated. And you might get anywhere between zero and four of these each day, depending on just how scarily precarious our power system is. These slots can – and do – strike at any time, day or night. But some are more irritating than others. Here are the three worst slots for two hours(+) of loadshedding.

    At number 3 is 22:00 – 00:30.

    Look, you could treat this as being a good opportunity to just go to bed early and get some more sleep. But there’s a reason that you wanted to stay up past 10pm. Maybe it was to do some stuff or – more likely – watch some football. During the summer months here, this slot sits right across all the midweek football matches from Mud Island, and is very frustrating for this reason alone. And then also for several others.

    Moving up on second base behind Nicholas van Whats-his-face (applause if you can place that lyric without the use of Ask Jeeves or some such) is 06:00 – 08:30.

    Because there is nothing nice about waking up in darkness and having to make tea and coffee, do the packed lunch run, get the kids out of bed and off to school, and get the beagle fed in darkness. Obviously, with the sun rising at about 5:30 here at the moment, the irritation is a little bit mitigated, but overall, this remains almost the most annoying couple of hours of power cuttery.

    But.

    THE MOST ANNOYING LOADSHEDDING SLOT IS [drum roll]

    20:00 – 22:30

    Yep. I said it. Look at the smug bastard, sitting right in the middle of your primetime evening enjoyment.
    Your happy time of the day. Ruined.

    First off, the 8pm start time is a complete git. No matter what time of the year, this will be dark in Cape Town. Even in summer (just). So no escaping without lighting of some sort. Candles, oil lamps, battery LEDs, they all work: it’s just a shlep to have to carry them around with you wherever you go.
    Baie frustrasie.
    It’s not like 8pm is an acceptable time to just give up on a normal day and go to bed. It’s too early. You’re not 10 years old any more. Your knees have been reminding you of that for a while now.

    And then, look at what time it finishes. 10:30pm. What are you supposed to do then? That’s the sort of time you actually do want to think about going to bed, but now you’ve got two hours of missed stuff to catch up on. And even if you were going to stay up for the footy (see above), you’ve missed some (or more) of the game.

    This particular loadshedding slot was the devised by Beelzebub Himself, and sent to test us to our very limits. And it did, just yesterday evening. Flipping annoying. Almost so completely infuriating that you’re willing to forgive all the other slots.

    Almost.

    Anyway, you might have your own opinions on this, but they’re probably not as valid as mine, so I’ll stick with my reasoning and conclusions above unless you can come up with something quite remarkable to support your case. And then probably after that, as well.

    More on that thing

    The that thing in question being loadshedding. Rolling blackouts. Power cuts. And I’m sorry to go on about it because I know that it’s really not a thing that South African residents need to hear any more about, and it’s probably not a thing thing that is of huge interest to those overseas.

    Yet.

    But it is completely dominating our lives at the moment, and it occurred to me, as my inner voice breathed a huge sigh of relief that our planned 12 hours of electrical darkness was reduced to “just” 8 yesterday, that I’m clearly suffering from some kind of Stockholm Syndrome. I think that it’s important not to do that. In a semi developed country such as SA, we shouldn’t have to accept 8 hours of no power every day and just be able to turn the other cheek, smile and say “Well, at least it wasn’t 12!”.
    We shouldn’t be normalising loadshedding. We should be angry about it.

    The courier guy who just came to our door (alerting me to his presence at the gate by a whistle, because the doorbell isn’t working, because we have no electricity, because of loadshedding), was certainly angry:

    No, man. I’m so moeg of it. And then your electrical items like your fridge and your TV get fucked up because of it.

    There’s nothing quite like an expletive in a Cape Coloured accent to really drive the message home.

    That said, there needs to be some balance and understanding as well (whatever your accent). Because the constant anger and stress will do our collective health no good whatsoever, and it won’t make a jot of difference to the situation.

    THERE IS NO QUICK FIX. We’ve missed our opportunity to to do that over the last 14+ years.

    Meanwhile, our government is doing very little to remedy the problems – some are even exacerbating them – although there was this absolute gem from serial disaster merchant and wannabe ANC leader, Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma:

    Well, no shit, Sherlock. Thanks for that valuable insight, just 14 years in the making.
    What a woman, trying desperately hard to be relevant ahead of the December ANC conference.
    So much soundbite. So little action.

    Still, even given all the nonsense I have described, those individuals who go out of their way to USE MORE electricity (when they have it), just because Eskom told them not to and they don’t like Eskom, are equal parts irritating and amusing. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot. To be honest, I’m sure it’s mainly internet bluster and bravado: surely no-one could actually be that stupid, right?

    Love it or hate it [Really?!? -Ed.], we’re unavoidably stuck with loadshedding for the foreseeable future and beyond.
    And as is clear from the several hundred words above, my advice is to just get used to it, but also very much, don’t let yourself just get used to it.

    I hope that helps.