Category: that’s a bit mad

Which is more expensive?

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Well, I can safely say that whatever we’re talking about, it’s probably more expensive now than it was this time last year.

But let’s compare like with like, instead of now with then.

I’m forever being asked about the prices of things. Printer ink, for example:

6000, exactly how expensive is printer ink?

We’ve all seen that thing about the world’s most expensive liquid being printer ink.
Of course, it’s not true – depending on what source you choose, perfume, scorpion venom, and the bloods of both human and… er… horseshoe crabs are way pricier* – but whenever you’re buying your printer ink cartridges**, it doesn’t feel that way.

So. Printer ink: actually not that expensive.

But no sooner have we determined that printer ink isn’t the world’s most expensive liquid (not even close), then suddenly the line of questioning obviously goes straight onto cars and cheese.

6000, pound for pound, which is more expensive: cars or cheese?

See?

At first thought, this seems fairly straightforward. It’s clearly… it’s… hang on, actually, which one is it?

Thankfully, there’s a graph. There’s always a graph.
And yeah: it’s actually pretty tight.

Can’t read it? Make it bigger by clicking here.

Is this pre-tariff or post-tariff? And if it is (or isn’t), which prices will be more affected?

OK, let’s leave out the ridiculously priced vehicular outliers at the top. And the run-of-the-mill mass produced dairy products at the bottom, and… it’s actually pretty even, isn’t it?

Stilton: more expensive than a Range Rover.
The 4 wheels of a BMW 330i: cheaper than a wheel of brie.

How bizarre.

It was Gouda outpricing a Ford Mustang GT that really got me, though. A Gen-4 5.0L Coyote V8 engine generating a track-ready 328kW of power and 540Nm of torque, or some rather bland, beige, Dutch dairy offering?

I know which one I’m choosing – and it’s not going to fit on a cracker.

I’m not sure if ranges of any other everyday products would fit together so nicely when measured on the same price for weight scale – oranges and refrigerators perhaps, or household pets and glass – but if anyone has any examples, please send them through.

.

* And if we’re going down the route of molecular biology reagents, then this stuff at €1,750 for 10uL (that’s 0.00001ml) beats everything else hands down.

** LPT: Get a tank printer.

Trailer Hire

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Bit late with today’s post, but maybe someone can please try and explain this one to me.

It’s a Facebook post from a trailer hire place down in Agulhas, and it starts off quite reasonably.

But then they add the hashtags, and I’ve actually no idea what is going on…

The smiley face at the end is the icing on the cake.

#karma #bitch #pitch #karma

Help. I don’t understand.

Crazy day

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Sick wife, sick daughter (exams start next week).

Grumpy beagle. Dust and grit everywhere.

Flooring to arrange. Invoices to pay.

Bathroom builders knocking seven bells out of several bits of the house.

And questions. So many questions.

What height do you want the basin?

What pattern should we use for the tiles?

How wide do you want this ledge?

Is your beagle usually this grumpy?

For the record, I went 900mm, offset,  75mm and no, she’s just had a rough few weeks.

Hopefully, once my wife emerges from her viral nastiness, she’ll agree that those were suitable answers.

Unsecured penguin caused helicopter crash in South Africa

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Yep. Not incorrect.

We’ve talked about flying penguins before. This guy wanted to try it, but the protagonist in our story here went high enough, and decided to promptly return right back down to earth, where penguins belong.

An “unsecured” penguin in a cardboard box was the cause of a helicopter crash in South Africa, a report into the incident has found.
The penguin, which had been placed in the box and on the lap of a passenger, slid off and knocked the pilot’s controls just after take-off from Bird Island off the Eastern Cape on 19 January.

Thankfully, no-one – including the penguin – was injured.

According to the report, released this week, the flight had been conducting an aerial survey of the island in Gqeberha, Eastern Cape province.
After completing the survey, the helicopter landed, where a specialist then requested the transport of one penguin back to Port Elizabeth.
The report did not say why they had picked up the penguin.

This is perfectly reasonable. No-one needs to know why you p-p-p-p-pick up a penguin. You might want a nice chocolate biscuit with your morning coffee. You might be involved in some shady penguin kidnapping scheme. That’s your business. We don’t need to know. We wouldn’t even know now if it weren’t for the damn bird crashing the aircraft.

All we need to make sure of is that now hat you’ve decided to pick up the penguin, you must complete a “risk assessment” and include the transport of the penguin on board.

The aviation authority said the pilot conducted a “risk assessment” but omitted to include the transport of the penguin on board which “was not in accordance with the Civil Aviation Regulations (CAR) 2011”.

Oh.

Oh dear.

The report said all situations should be subject to “established safety protocols” and compliance with aviation safety procedures.

I’m not 100% au fait with how many of those “established safety protocols” and aviation safety procedures specifically mention the transportation of penguins, but reasonably, you’ve got to guess that it’s probably very few.

Anyway, all’s well that ends well, and we should be happy that there were no casualties on this occasion.

But as always, there are lessons to be learned here, and next time you are transporting a penguin in a helicopter, I trust that you will remember this blog post, and be well aware of the inherent dangers of such an endeavour.

Work memories

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Remembering back to my University days, there was one occasion when a few of us were approached by a guy outside the Students Union.

He said he could give us work putting lipstick on anesthetised pandas, and that if there were more than 10 of us doing it, his business would even qualify for a government subsidy.

At the time, I was very grateful to have a job, but looking back now, it didn’t feel like it was real employment.

I was clearly just there to make up the numb bears.