You have GoT to be joking

It’s not my thing, but I do recognise that the drama series Game of Thrones is very much the zeitgeist, and that’s just fine. However, when the UN hasn’t quite got around to calling world leaders together to debate the latest pre-apocalyptic move by North Korea, but they’re still tweeting this sort of thing:

We’ll be having a special meeting of the Security Council to discuss the implications of using dragons in warfare, pursuant to the Geneva Convention. 

…I can’t help but think that things have gone a bit far.

Priorities, people. One of these things is actually real.

Pairs of animals

This is a post about pairs of animals. Not since the mythical days of Noah and his big wooden boat have so many animals been paired up – and he didn’t even do it in a blog post.

It’s two, by the way. Two pairs of animals.

The first pair is a hawk and a snake. Sadly, neither of them is with us anymore, after a disastrous electrocution incident in northern Montana, USA. It’s believed that the hawk, fancying a sssssnack, swooped down and picked up the snake in its talons, before retreating to a convenient local power line in order to eat its prey.
Ssssssadly, the snake must have been dangling beneath the hawk and touched one of the other power lines as the bird came in to land. If any hawks are reading this (and they might be, because they have eyes like a… like a haw… well look, they just have really good eyes, ok?), let it be a lesson to you to always hold your lengthy prey somewhere in the middle, to prevent excess danglage.

Both the snake (already in a great deal of peril) and the hawk (peckish (no pun intended), but otherwise largely doing fine), were electrocuted and died.

Hawkward:

Their still smouldering carcasses then fell to the vegetation below and started a fire which consumed 40 acres of Montana.
Look, if you’re going to go, go bigly.

The hawk and the snake aren’t the only ones to have started fires. There’s a whole list of animal arsonists on that site: squirrels, dogs, pigeons, kites. They’re all at it.

Our other animal pairing is elephants and bees. They haven’t (to the best of my knowledge), been arsoning together. In fact, elephants aren’t huge fans of bees at all, and would much rather stay well away from them, like some pachyderm/apian apartheid situation.

“So what?” I hear you ask. “At least they aren’t starting fires.”
And yes, that’s great news for African farmers, but what’s even better news for African farmers is that they can use bees as a natural deterrent to keep elephants off their crops:

In more than a dozen studies, Dr. King and her colleagues have experimented with beehive fences on East African farms, finding that the region’s indigenous bee, Apis mellifera scutellata, can turn elephants away. A notable long-term trial on farms outside of the Tsavo East National Park found that hive fences deterred 80 percent of elephant raiders compared to unfenced plots used as a control group.

And then, because the farmers need to keep the bees happy to keep the bee numbers up to make the fences effective, they can tap off the honey – which is made by the happy bees – for a second income stream, while reaping more from their original, more traditional crops. Everyone’s a winner.
Apart from the elephants, obviously.

If you have any more interesting (or not) stories about pairs of animals and how they can affect our daily lives (if we’re in Montana or Chad), then don’t hesitate to get in touch and we might even share your tale on 6000 miles…

Party in the Dark

A new Mogwai album Every Country’s Sun comes out on Friday. Here’s one of the tracks from it: Party in the Dark.

Bit of a new direction from them – very vocal, rather shoegaze. And a video which thinly veils the reproductive process through wax sculptures and 60’s-style sci-fi.

I love it, but hardcore fans are apparently less convinced. Fortunately for them, there’s promise of more traditional Mogwai sound on the other pre-release, Coolverine, which also has a compelling, classy, monochrome slo-mo video to go with it.

Reject call with message

I was on a (landline) conference call the other day when my cellphone began to ring. I couldn’t take the call, so I rejected it with a message by clicking the “Reject call with message” button on my phone. It sent a message to the caller which read:

Sorry, I can’t take your call at the moment.

Which wasn’t actually very useful, since they already knew that I couldn’t take their call at the moment, as I hadn’t taken their call.

So I spent some of the rest of the conference call (the boring bit about costings for the new project) editing the pre-written messages* on my phone, so that I could be more helpful when rejecting calls with messages in the future. I could think of loads of useful, informative options, but there was only space for six messages so I had to be selective and choose the most important ones, each of which can now be selected and sent at the push of a single button.

I’m hoping that these new, improved messages will give more clarity as to why I’m not answering people’s calls in the future. I can think of several occasions where I would have used each of these over the past fortnight alone. Especially the one about the beagles [involuntary shudder].

 

* for my Sony: Phone > Menu > Settings > Calls > Manage reject messages

Unspiration

My new favourite Instagram account (apart from my own Instagram account, durr!) is this one: Unspirational.

When browsing Instagram, I don’t see a lot of landscapes ruined by pithy “inspirational” quotes, because I carefully choose to follow people who carefully choose not to post landscapes ruined by pithy “inspirational” quotes.

It’s not rocket science.

Still, I am aware of the LRBP”I”Q phenomenon, so it’s nice that someone has come up with an antithesis to it. And the best bit (for me) is that a lot of these un(in)spirational are loosely based around well-known “inspirational” quotes. Clever.

Many are full of good advice:

Plenty more where that came from – so click through on the link above and be generally anti-social, miserable (but actually rather amused) just like me.