Welcome to South Africa

Occasionally, I use a service called UCOOK. they deliver recipes and ingredients, or they deliver ready made meals for you to reheat. It’s not cheap, but in the first instance above, it’s quite fun to make something different, and in the second, it can be very convenient.

I will be more likely to use UCOOK when they have a special offer on. Usually it’s some wine with your meal, but today’s offer was for some Stella Artois and some Stella Artois chalices.
Yes. Chalices. That’s what they’re called.

I was expecting delivery before 5pm, but then I got this SMS, which I could only ever have got in South Africa:

“Apologies for the inconvenience”? Never mind that, tell me if the damn driver is ok. I’m not even particularly bothered about my glasses chalices. I can’t believe that a UCOOK truck filled only with frozen craft pizzas and a few cans of Stella got hijacked.

I mean, it’s not exactly a high risk shipment, is it? It’s not cold, hard cash or expensive jewellery or illicit drugs. It’s pizza and beer. And not even a lot of pizza and beer. You could hijack a pizza van and a beer van and get loads more (albeit for twice the effort). And you’ve still got to cook the pizza and cool the beer – no mean feat given the fact that there’s zero electricity around at the moment.

It’s just a bizarre – and uniquely South African – thing to happen.

On a more serious note, I have emailed UCOOK to enquire as to the well-being of their driver, and to pass on our support and sympathy. I’ll drop some feedback here when I get it.

Saturday

I’ll be completely honest with you all. If I had known that I was going to get up early and do a Parkrun this morning, I would probably not have had quite so many large draught Stella Artois’ last night.

The pizza didn’t help either.

But with 300ml of the beer for R44 and 500ml for R49, it really didn’t seem to make financial sense to take the small ones. And the last 200ml of each glass tasted particularly cheap good.

It was therefore a bit of an ordeal to get up rather earlier than I would normally have chosen, step out into the misty Cape Town morning, a) go to the Parkrun, and then b) actually run it hard, rather than have a gentle jog for 5km.

Picture my surprise less than 27 minutes later to have come in the top ten for my age group and with a personal best, nogal. I stood there at the finish, amazed and steaming gently in the Constantia morning air.

As you do.

Tomorrow, I will stay in bed a bit later, not necessarily by choice, but more likely because I won’t be able to actually get up.