But what would we be starting on?
Well, I ended up down another conspiracy theory rabbit hole this morning. Specifically one about chemtrails and geoengineering. You know, the general tinfoil hattery that we’re all being played for fool by global corporations and the New World Order?
The usual stuff.
But this time, there’s clear evidence that this is a real thing. And that evidence comes in the form of this tweet from @uslawreview:
To be fair, I have no idea what the weather was like where I live 30 or 40 years ago, because I didn’t live here. But judging by the moaning about the cold and rain in winter and the wind in the summer, things have been this way for a while. Perhaps we need some engineering – something to make it cold and rainy in the summer and windy in the winter? I dunno, I’m just brainstorming here.
But why would the weathermen never say a word about the constant spraying? Perhaps because it’s just not a thing. No. Justin Despair knows why. It’s because they’re in on the whole thing:
“Seek sources of truth online,” says Justin, without even a hint of irony in his tweet.
Personally, I blame the pilots. Just like Ricardo.
But maybe I shouldn’t:
But they must still know, right? Last time I was piloting a commercial transcontinental passenger flight, the chemtrails switch was very much a mechanical thing. I had to flick it, just as we passed over @uslawreview’s place, just like my handlers told me to.
My only issue was trying not to notice the dodgy photoshopping on the panel, as I – grimly faced – pumped tens of thousands of litres of weather-altering mind control particulates into the troposphere. Well, that and then not telling anyone about it. Ever.
So weird that so few individuals ever asked about what was going on.
Yeah, I do note that you’re a Sheffield Wednesday fan though, so clearly you must have had something deactivated in your brain.
OK, C.J. Bowden – but remember that Justin told us that the truth was online. Not in the chemical-filled sky. Seems sensible to hide inside and not to be staring at the sun all day.
Gonna have to cut this one short: loadshedding shit just hit the (non-spinning) fan, which is sad, because I was trying to get some fresh air in from outside. The sunshine, the light breeze, the weird “clouds”…