Category: world cup 2010

World Cup 2010 and ‘living on the edge’ in South Africa

Posted on

I was forwarded a link to Rian Malan’s piece for The Observer this Sunday in which he describes how each day in South Africa

…brings momentous exhilarations and dumbfounding setbacks. 

and although he and I apparently sit on very different sides of the fence as far as our views on the national energy and optimism go, I do agree with this sentiment at least. Never a day goes by – especially in the lead up to this World Cup tournament – without the positivity being ruined by a neagtive incident or the air of depression being lifted by a positive moment.
Things happen here.  

Once more, South Africa has found an issue to be divided over. This is a fairly regular occcurance and I’ve given up on trying to keep my Venn diagram updated, having exhausted my son’s supply of felt tip pens. This time, it’s not race or money, politics, culture or crime – it’s whether we should be hosting the World Cup next month.
According to his column, Malan thinks not, but his maid Gladys Dladla, can’t wait.
And that’s because she puts a value on pride and he does not. (Incidentally, her value system means that Mr Malan is always impeccably turned out, as well.)
For Malan, it just comes down to money and having spent a lot of it to host the World Cup, we’re not going to get any back:

We have nothing to gain from the World Cup but the pleasure of your company, so it would be nice if you changed your minds about coming. Please! We’ve almost bankrupted ourselves in our determination to stage a tournament that runs like clockwork. And if it doesn’t – you can have a chuckle at our expense.
Now we’re all saddled by debts it will take generations to pay off. I’m so riled that part of me would be gratified if the World Cup were a complete failure.

That’s nice, Rian. A really blinkered, head-in-the-sand way of looking at things. Jeez – if you weren’t so apparently “well respected”, I’d (possibly) come over and give you a fat slap.
Honestly, you are better educated than to be peddling misinformation like that “we have nothing to gain from the World Cup but the pleasure of your company” bullshit. Who are you trying to fool, anyway? When was the last time you went up to someone in the street and asked them if they think the World Cup is a good idea? Everyone already has an opinion. People’s minds are made up. Either they’re anti-World Cup or they’re pro-World Cup. The former already think like you and the latter really don’t care.
Would there really be any benefit for you, other than the opportunity to have a smug grin on your face, if it did all come apart at the seams? And would that be worth it?

Oh, and while we’re at it on the whole melodramatic front, what’s this “life on the edge” thing, you’re living?
“Lunching with friends at an outdoor restaurant that was recently held up by armed robbers” isn’t “life on the edge”.
“Lunching with friends at an outdoor restaurant that is currently being held up by armed robbers” is “life on the edge”. Drizzling olive oil over your smoked chicken salad as they steal your companions’ wallets, finishing your conversation before you let them take your cellphone.
Honestly, that’s like me saying I live “life on the edge” because I once drove through Lockerbie and we all know what happened there.

But of course, it’s the overseas readers you want the sympathy from. How often do I read the work of a local writer which has been adapted and embellished for distribution to those who don’t know any better?
You want them to believe that the only way to get out of a tin shack is to bribe an official, when you and I both know that it’s not. You want them to believe that we’re barely hanging on – we’re not. You juxtapose our existence against that of a “normal society”. That would be a valid comparison if we were a fully-fledged Western nation. But we’re not.  

I’m not denying that South Africa has spent a lot on bringing this tournament to the country. But I dispute that we’re not going to get anything back from it. I think we’re already getting things back from it. Local infrastructure has got a HUGE kick up the backside – we’ve got new roads and new buses, those “problems” that have been there for years are being dealt with. And yes, it might not seem to be the right way to go about things – that this should all be happening anyway: but it wasn’t, was it?

Then there’s the tourism exposure: showcasing South Africa to a global audience of billions. This won’t bring in any money in MalanWorld, obviously, since no-one wants to watch a failed tournament, do they? But this is the biggest medium to long term benefit and it’s the reason that people like Malan are a dangerous self-fulfilling prophecy – if people aren’t having a good time here, then we won’t reap those extra tourist numbers. Do us all a favour and stay inside then, Rian.

But finally there’s the massive value of the pride. Pride in uniting behind the national team and showing the world that “even” South Africa, beset with problems and difficulties, can host the world’s biggest sporting event and do it well and do it right. Football matches remain the most multicultural events I have ever seen in South Africa. And in a country where racial division exists everywhere else in society, that’s no mean feat.

The World Cup will come here. It will be a huge success and will be enjoyed by millions. Every little issue or flaw will be leapt upon by Rian and his sort, but I fancy they will be drowned out by the vuvuzelas.
I truly wish that aural censorship would continue long after 2010 as well.

Three things

Posted on

And they’re all about football, so if that sort of thing doesn’t intere… hello? Hello?

Hmm. Well, bugger you. I’m going to write it anyway.

Firstly, well done to Chelsea, who emphatically finished off the Premiership season with a little 8-0 drubbing of hapless Wigan “Athletic”.

Secondly, it’s 25 years since the Bradford Fire – the “forgotten tragedy of the Eighties“. 56 people died at that football match.
I can remember watching it on the news the next morning. I’d have been 11 years old and it would have been a Sunday. I had a habit of going downstairs at about 6am and watching the breakfast kids’ TV (such as it was back then), but the morning TV was dominated with the news of the fire. The pictures were horrific – I can still clearly see the man staggering out of the stand – on fire, but seemingly not even realising it.
It meant more because it was local to us and because there were so many stories of children being killed and injured just because they went to what should have been a celebratory match at the end of their championship winning season.
That top link is worth reading.

Finally, more happy news. We spent the afternoon at the Waterfront, gazing momentarily at the World Cup trophy. That’s my picture of it on the right. It was part of the Coca-Cola sponsored Trophy Tour and, despite the rain, was very well attended.
There was live music, an emotional 3D film of World Cups past (and future) and of course, the actual trophy. It was boxed in perspex, but you could get within a metre of it and no-one tried to steal it (as far as I’m aware).

Which isn’t very South African, now is it?

Reuters joins the bandwagon

Posted on

Oh PLEASE!

Tourists in South Africa including soccer fans heading to the World Cup must guard against mosquito bites and avoid contact with raw meat due to an outbreak of Rift Valley fever, the World Health Organization said on Tuesday.
Many tourists visit South Africa’s game parks and the WHO warned visitors to avoid contact with dead animals — another way of catching the disease.

Yes. Do avoid the dead animals which litter South Africa’s game parks. Indeed, last time I was in a game park, I couldn’t move for dead animals. There are so many of them that they use them to make the roads and houses out of. Dead animals. Everywhere.
What Reuters and the WHO fail to mention is that death may also be caused by several of the live animals in these parks as well. In fact, I would argue that this is far more dangerous than having contact with the dead animals. Which are everywhere.

Officials in South Africa, the host of the 2010 World Cup from June 11 to July 11, have reported 172 human cases of the animal viral disease this year.

172 cases, eh? Out of a population of 46 million people. Truly Hectic. 
What they neglect to mention is that ALL 172 WERE FOOTBALL FANS! Because that is the high risk group for Rift Valley Fever.
I know this because I’m a microbiologist. And a football fan.
But I’m safe because I wear one of those suits like Dustin Hoffman in Outbreak while I’m wading through the thigh-deep heaps of dead animals in the local game parks.

The virus can be transmitted through the handling of animal tissue during slaughtering or butchering, assisting with animal births, veterinary procedures or from disposing of carcasses.
Herders, farmers, slaughterhouse workers and veterinarians are at higher risk of infection.

Sorry, that should obviously read:

Herders, farmers, slaughterhouse workers, veterinarians and football fans are at higher risk of infection.

Especially if those football fans are going to watch some footy in our amazing new stadiums and then go and do some herding, farming, abattoir and veterinary work. Which, after all, is what football fans usually do after games.

Ah yes, it brings a tear to the eye as I remember watching the mighty Red And White Wizzards at Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane and then hurrying, along with the other 30,000 spectators, out along the A630 and the A57 out into Derbyshire to assist with animal births, handle some animal tissue (careful now) and dispose of some carcasses.
I mean, it’s like a ritual for most football fans, isn’t it? A quick pint before the game, 90 minutes of exciting football with a dodgy pie at half time and then off to do some veterinary procedures.
Right.

So yes. You might get Rift Valley Fever if you interact with dead animals in South Africa.
So don’t interact with dead animals in South Africa.

And if you believe this sort of thing poses a genuine risk to you. And the thing about the earthquakes. And the supposed race war. 
Then just don’t come. Really.

We won’t miss you.

Goal.com Traveller’s Guide To South Africa: Crime And Safety

Posted on

It’s actually very difficult to get an objective view on crime and safety in South Africa. As with many subjects, it depends on the perceptions of the individual as to what sort of report you’re going to get. And those reports will range from the hysteria of the ex-pat in Perth to the firmly-staying-put South African ostrich with his head in the sand pretending everything is peachy.
The imminent arrival of the FIFA World Cup has not only increased the discussion around this issue, it has further polarised the differing viewpoints.

But, you may be surprised to learn, neither of these extremes is actually the case.

Here at 6000 miles… we’ve always taken the more sensible middle-of-the-road route. Yes, there is a problem, but that doesn’t mean that you’re going to get raped, murdered, robbed, mugged or anything else while you’re here in South Africa. 
It’s actually not the crime that is the real problem when discussing crime – it’s the perception of the crime: 

The United Nations Interregional Crime and Justice Research Institute have conducted research on the victims of crime in the country, which shows the picture of South African crime as more typical of a developing country.
These statistics show that South Africa has lower rates of violent crime than most African and South American countries, but due to the fact that South Africa is often compared to the developed world, the crime rate is considered high when measured against the likes of England, the US, Italy, Germany and other first world countries.

And at last, it seems that some sort of reasonable voice has made it into the media ahead of the World Cup in the form of Goal.com’s Traveller’s Guide to South Africa: Crime and Safety. It’s like a longer and more detailed version of the infamous Big South African Crime Post of almost three years ago.
And I can’t find fault with it at all.

In the lead up to the World Cup, I’m going to be doing a number of posts on what to expect when visiting South Africa, but goal.com’s Peter Pedroncelli has saved me the job on the whole safety and security issue. Thanks, Pete.

If you’re coming for the World Cup (or even if you’re not) read it and get a dose of reality.

UPDATE: More sense from Andrew Harding.

Race war still not happening

Posted on

After the recent hugely disappointing news that South Africa’s eagerly anticipated (by the press) Race War had been postponed due to a lack of protagonists sunshine, many people have been getting in touch with us here at 6000 miles… asking when exactly the rearranged date for the Race War is.
Well, I was heading out to buy a sandwich at the local Café Lacomia wondering what the best way of predicting the outbreak of the Race War would be, when I had an epiphany in that regard.
As you do.
The café in question is located in a branch of Builders Warehouse, a local chain of DIY/Gardening stores. If you are in the UK, you would probably be best comparing this to a B&Q.  

Of course, there are some local peculiarities: Builder Whorehouse has an extensive swimming pool section, B&Q doesn’t need one of them. The store also stocks pangas (pangae?) – better known worldwide as machetes. Considering there is heavy duty gardening to be done in the UK as well, I’m surprised that they’re not more popular over there, but they’re not.
Of course, the panga is also often noted as an African weapon of war and will be much in evidence on the darker side of the front lines when the Race War is eventually rescheduled.

         

Presumably, the paler guys will be armed with Black and Decker weedeaters which should present a formidable defence, Eskom willing. And as long as the little stringy bit doesn’t break too often. 

Either way, when the Race War comes about, there will obviously be a period of arming up before the actual fighting begins. And where better for your local Xhosa Warrior to buy his panga than Builders Warehouse, with its amazing No-Quibble Guarantee?

That’s where my “forearmed is forewarned” plan comes in:
The Builders Warehouse Panga Race War Prediction Index.

No, it’s not catchy and neither is the BWPRWPI acronym. It sounds a bit like a wet fart.
But it will work. Because right now, the local Builders Warehouse has a huge number of pangas (pangae?) in stock. Great for hacking back that dense bush or those Bloody Agents with White Tendencies.
And should that number drop suddenly and considerably, then I will bet that there will be trouble ahead. Thus, the BWPRWPI is measured as the percentage of pangae (pangas?) remaining in stock, using yesterday’s numbers as a benchmark of 100%. (Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on the weedeaters as well, just in case there’s a sudden and unexpected AWB uprising in Cape Town.)

Right now, the BWPRWPI remains steady at 100.
Which is bad news for Builders Warehouse, but wonderful for the Rainbow Nation.