Bidding

Did I ever fly from Heathrow Terminal 1?

I honestly can’t remember. But I can’t fly from there any more, because it shut down almost three years ago. Fortunately, there seems to be no process of shuffling up, as in 2 becomes 1, 3 becomes 2, 4 becomes 3 and 5 becomes 4. Because that would be both confusing and unnecessary.

Why am I telling you about a disused airport terminal?

I’m telling about a disused airport terminal, because now you can buy most of it.

Seriously.

There are loads of things to buy, most of which will end up in local Hipster bars and avgeeks’ sheds around the locality, I’m sure. But there are some amazing items. Just look at Lot 1!

A whole Heathrow Terminal 1 sign.
Description:

Heathrow Terminal 1 sign

Brilliant.

Moving on, check that your beagle isn’t packing heat (I’m convinced ours is trying to kill me) by putting this handy Passenger Metal Detector at your front door:

Or get your own “square”(?) metal box construction baby changing room sign. I went in high on this one – and I bet that extra penny will make the difference.

Your local Security Guard will surely thank you(?) for getting her or him this comfortable-looking(??) SECURITY FOOTSTOOL.

And in case you ever decide to run a medical facility and need a menacing way to count patients, this SICK PEOPLE COUNTER would definitely come in handy.

But all that previous stuff (cool though it is) fades into pale insignificance, because then there was this.

The pièce de résistance, the LOGAN PLEATED BELT CAROUSEL UNIT. APPROX 35 DEGREE INCLINE, SINGLE CENTRE FEEDER BELT DESIGN. MOTOR CATERPILLAR/CHAIN DRIVE SYSTEM, F4 TOW CHAIN, STAINLESS STEEL MAINTENANCE HANDRAILS, 8 OVERHEAD EMERGENCY STOP BUTTONS, 4 SINGLE PODIUM INFORMATION MONITORS. BELT LENGTH 43M, DIMENSIONS L 17M W 6 H 1M. LOW SMOKE & FUME SLATS LAST SERVICED 2011/12

I’ll be honest, it was the F4 TOW CHAIN that swung this for me. This would have been one of the first models to feature this revolutionary (no pun intended) new F4 TOW CHAIN. And I’m sure that you will agree that it was a huge improvement over the previous F3 TOW CHAIN. The upgraded technology on the F4 TOW CHAIN link mechanisms for one: groundbreaking.
In fact, looking back now, I wonder (as I’m sure you are too) as to how the F3 TOW CHAIN would ever have powered a BELT LENGTH 43M. I don’t think it could. It couldn’t.

Thank god we’ve moved on. from those Neanderthal days.

This LOGAN PLEATED BELT CAROUSEL UNIT features the standard LOW SMOKE & FUME SLATS, which is great news if you’re planning to use it as a Lazy Susan on your row of check-in desks huge new dining table (LOT 2109).

And with those 8 OVERHEAD EMERGENCY STOP BUTTONS and 4 SINGLE PODIUM INFORMATION MONITORS – we’re talking top of the range here. I’m sure there will be a lot of interest on this one.

It does need a service though.

The Qantas A380 post

After an impromptu Twitter debate yesterday evening, I have found myself photoshopping this Qantas A380 into various images in any moments of spare time this morning.

It’s a long and actually rather uninteresting backstory, but I have discovered that adding a Qantas A380 to any photo not only makes that photo better, it’s also quite a cathartic process.

Additionally, I got a couple of helpful replies from the legend that is Jules Hudson – presenter of BBC’s Escape To The Country – and all round aircraft noise avoidance technique expert (residential).

Anyway, you can look forward to occasional images with the additional of the above aircraft on here. And then you’ll see what I mean.

UK travel costs

I’m booking train tickets for a lightning quick visit to the UK, post the Cast In Steel 2016 visit to Bergen in May. And they’re expensive.

Of course, everything is expensive when you look at the tragic state of the South African Rand, but travel – especially train travel in the UK – is stupidly, near prohibitively, expensive.

But what are you supposed to do? You can’t walk.
Last time, with Mrs 6000 and the kids with me, it made more financial sense to hire a car and drive up the M1. And that’s 260km with petrol costing R24 an litre. Still pricey. But with just me going, that option seems less financially viable this time around.

It’s not just me though. Infamously, last month (as infamous as something that recent can be, anyway), Jordon Cox, aka “The Coupon Kid” travelled from Sheffield to Essex via Berlin – included a day out in the German capital – and still saved money.

flight2    flight1

Although his money-saving achievement was somewhat overlooked by The Guardian whose main concern was that it wasn’t environmentally friendly. Missing the point, much?

And then there was this, with the argument around football ticket pricing becoming a bigger and bigger thing:

footycost

And yes, maybe Mr Tyneside_Blades (if that is his real name) could choose a cheaper (and almost certainly far more enjoyable) hobby than watching Sheffield United, but saying that is merely employing Guardianesque diversion tactics. (Incidentally, someone had a go at that here, and was summarily defeated.)

The point here (again) is the comparison between travel to/from Essex/near London and travel to/from Germany.

So I looked, but I couldn’t find a suitable route via Germany. *sad face*

I did find one via Dublin though.
And here’s my maths (no, I don’t have time for stadium tours or a ham and cheese toastie):

Fullscreen capture 2016-02-08 111033 AM.bmp

My plane from Bergen arrives at LHR, so that’s my starting point for either journey. I don’t get to leave the airport at Dublin, so I won’t spend anything at the Guinness Brewery, and my Dad will pick me up from station or airport, so that bit is for his account, (but ok, for the record it’s basically 5 miles to the station and 25 miles to the airport).

A few other points:
Yes, this includes all taxes, and a minimum of 20kg luggage allowance for the planes. Heavy.
Yes, I have to allow about 3½ hours for the train journey, while the flights would take about 6 hours. Time.
Yes, the train would be more environmentally friendly. Smoky.
No, despite the graphics above, I’m not expecting to travel by Pullman Coaches or Boeing 747 on these journeys. Inaccuracy.

I probably won’t end up doing this, but the point is that I could. And it simply doesn’t make sense that I could.

I’m not really sure who to complain to about the whole thing though, so I just wrote a blog post.

Thanks for reading it.

Heathrow Timelapse

This, spotted on twitter, is lovely.

User @BT77W works in the ATC tower at the airport and describes himself as a:

Professional aluminium tubing export/importer

And hey, you should see his garage. Wow.

Thoughts on Ebola screening

Having been to the UK this last week, having traveled (twice, nogal) through the global hub that is Dubai, and with Ebola knocking ISIS from the headlines at the moment, I thought I’d jot down a few thoughts I had while attempting not to contract Ebola or any other virus.

Firstly, that headline thing. Yes. Ebola is the number one headline in the UK news at the moment. Mainly stories around the country’s preparation for any incoming cases and the screening at the airports. Or ‘airport’, anyway. Fly into Manchester and you’re home free – no scans, no questions asked, no nothing. Just a hint for any suicide bioterrorists there.
So yes, number one headline, despite the fact that there are no UK cases. It’s an odd way of allaying fears and avoiding hysteria and it’s cementing my opinion that Ebola is a “superstar disease”. The current outbreak is bad news, certainly, but needs to be put in context – perhaps with some sort of graphic:

causes_of_death_africa.0

The fact that it needs ringing in yellow says a lot. And yes, I realise that the Ebola thing is current and it’s acute, but still. This outbreak has killed thirty times fewer people than even “Fire, heat, and hot substances”. And let me tell you, some of those hot substances can be pretty damn deadly. But joking aside, you’re seventy times more likely to die of malnutrition than Ebola and we don’t seem to be quite as concerned with that. That’s rather sad.

But if the rest of the world is to have a reaction to Ebola and is to try and prevent its spread, then it needs to be a sensible and organised approach so as to be effective, hence my confusion at the screening being solely at Heathrow (and possibly Gatwick and bizarrely, on Eurostar trains). If you’re serious about screening passengers and keeping Ebola out of the UK (and despite the fact that it’s not a particularly effective means of determining who’s carrying the infection), then why not do it at Manchester airport as well?
There’s no point in locking your front door if you’re going to leave all your windows open.

No-one at Manchester batted an eyelid when I flew in from Dubai, even though there are excellent links from there to West Africa. Every bit as good as the ones to Heathrow.
And, with that in mind, I saw nothing – NOTHING – at Dubai about Ebola. And that place is like some terrestrial version of a Star Wars space station – what an extraordinary mix of people and nationalities. If Ebola is to get a foothold anywhere else, then it may well be through Dubai. But there’s no mention of it there at all.
Finally, Cape Town, which (amazingly? reassuringly?) had the best response of the airports I used. And that was merely an announcement asking me to “go and talk to the people at the Health Desk if I’d been to West Africa in the last few weeks”. This self-reporting with a disease which carries a stigma like an STD? It’s not exactly foolproof, is it?

I’m really not sure there is good reason for screening passengers arriving at any airport, although there are some experts who believe that there are other benefits besides the limited chance of detecting anyone carrying the virus:

Prof David Evans, a virologist at the University of Warwick, says that while testing passengers is “unlikely to detect symptomatic cases” as they arrive in this country, “the introduction of inbound passenger testing will both raise awareness and provide information that should ensure that passengers who subsequently develop symptoms can rapidly seek medical advice and, if needed, treatment.” The measures are, therefore, sensible, “primarily because they raise awareness of the disease in travellers and their contacts.”

But it also seems utterly pointless if you’re not going to do it thoroughly.

UPDATE: And, as if by magic…

What a good idea, guys…