Tag: scotland

“Massive trouble ahead”

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As the Scottish Independence Referendum approaches, I’ve been keeping my distance, watching from the back seat. It’s not my shout, of course, but it will obviously have repercussions on my native homeland. Namely, that if the ‘Yes’ campaign wins, we’ll have to bail them out when things go horribly wrong (as they inevitably will) in the next few decades.

With a binary vote and with things being so tight, these tweets from Simon Schama could be worryingly prophetic:

And while the “other” 50% might also feel alienated if the no vote wins this week, the status quo prevails. Yes, they can be disappointed or annoyed that nothing changes, but nothing changes. If the yes vote wins, everything changes, despite half the population not wanting it to.

Interesting times ahead.

Seagull divebombs woman. She claims £30,000.

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Amazing stuff from Scotland:

A woman who claims she was injured when a seagull swooped at her during her lunch-break is suing the owners of the building where she worked.
Cathie Kelly said she stumbled on steps as she tried to escape the “terrifying” dive-bombing bird outside the Ladyburn business centre in Greenock.
She has raised an action for damages at the Court of Session in Edinburgh.

I’ve been divebombed by seagulls before, and let me tell you, genuinely, it’s not fun. They don’t mess about. On one infamous occasion, while chivalrously trying to protect my future wife from an aggressive airborne avian attack, I fell and hurt my right leg quite badly. I didn’t then sue the Isle of Man Government for damages though, despite the fact that they were responsible for the cliffs on which the bird was nesting.

You can’t be doing that. What sort of legal precedent would any positive outcome set?

“Rabbit eats lettuce from vegetable patch. Householder sues nearby farmer who has rabbit holes in his field.”

“Seal belches loudly near boat during harbour boat ride. Tourist claims damages from V&A Waterfront.”

“Woman drives too close to elephant in Kruger National Par… hang on… no, we’ve done that one already”

But a slight stumble on the steps is only the tip of the metaphorical iceberg. Brace yourselves, folks, because here’s the harrowing tale of another of worker in the same building:

Mrs Ann Walsh, manager with Enterprise Childcare, who also works in the Ladyburn business centre, said the gull problem had been going on for years.
“I was attacked myself by gulls,” she said. “I was poo-ed on as part of the attack.”

Poo-ed on? POO-ED ON?!??!??!? That’s got to be worth another ten grand, surely?!?!

We have pigeons where I work, but they aren’t as aggressive as gulls. I’m quite sure they carry fourteen times as many illnesses though. In fact, I think I’m developing a slight cough… high fever… dyspnoea… pneumonia… death!

It must be psittacosis. Damn those pigeons.

I need a lie down… and a lawyer. Is Barry Roux free next week?

Exploding wind turbine

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The recent wintery weather that has battered Scotland (see these pictures on the BBC News website) led to a wind turbine at the Ardrossan Wind Farm bursting into flames.

 

Och no! They’ve removed the image. Still, see below….

 

A small amount of detective work led me to more photos as part of this flickr set.

Oooh – I bet Paternoster simply can’t wait!