Afrikaans Celebrity Voices on your GPS

File under: Titles you never thought you’d see on 6000 miles…

But, anyway:
Local company GPS Creative have been in touch with their latest product range – the perfect gift for a the man (or woman) who has everything this Christmas.

After all – who wants to hear that monotone, computerised american chick giving you directions when you could have the dulcet tones of Minki van der what’s-her-surname-this-week telling you exactly where she wants you to go?

I’d better just clarify – I think you get her voice as an add-on for your GPS, not actually her.
Still – you can dream.

And there are more: Kurt Darren, Oom Kallie Marie, Os du Randt, Pieter Koen, Shaleen Surtie-Richards – not to mention the legendarily ageless Riaan Cruywagen – to mention but a few.
It’s like the pages of HuisGenoot and Sarie (my inspirasie) have come to life and are accurately directing you to hard to find geographical locations.

So click on the banners and get the celebrity voice of your choice at the special rate of R149.95.
And they have an offer on right now: buy one voice and receive Bruno the Bender AND Franco Fontein absolutely FREE!

Bakgat!

Last minute help

I guess it depends what you define as “last minute”, but things are certainly moving towards the dangerous end of the scale if you haven’t done your christmas shopping for your other half yet.
But never fear – 6000 miles… is here to help. And how.

Behold – the Inflatable Toast Mattress:

toast_mattress

Breakfast in bed? No, breakfast IS the bed! Sleeping on this giant 6′ by 7′ Inflatable Toast Mattress is likely to make you dream that you are a pad of butter and that you are floating down a river of freshly brewed coffee.
In reality, you should not use the Inflatable Toast Mattress as a flotation device nor should you expose it to excessive heat. This piece of toast is made of plastic, not bread, so if you wake up and smell burning toast, you are probably just having a stroke.

At just $169.95 (that’s a mere R1,274.63 at today’s exchange rate), this is the ideal gift for someone that… erm… really likes… toast.

 

But if that doesn’t quite fit the bill, then how about these other suggested gift ideas?

snip 

I’m told that inflatable turkey with an inflatable fruitcake dessert is the christmas meal of choice for those trying to shed a few kilos. Air is virtually calorie free, while most humans are unable to digest polyethylene vinyl. 
Sounds ever so healthy. But if you end up getting sick, you can always retire to your toast mattress.