Spotted online today

In various places, these:

Don’t click on the picture. You won’t get 100GB. And if you had clicked on the image where I got it from, it’s almost certain that you wouldn’t get 100GB either. It’s a scam.
But, as this image of the Bafana Bafana 2010 World Cup starting line-up against Mexico (I think?) suggests, this is obviously “the occasion of our national team”, so why wouldn’t you expect to get a phat lump of data because of that?


Hungry?

AI is weird, isn’t it? I know exactly what I’m looking at here, but it clearly isn’t it. The caption is perfect, though, suggesting – to me at least – a drug-fuelled descent into visual and mental chaos. But that pizza and beer combination does sound good for at least one evening this weekend.


Do you WFH?

This amused me. The old adage “it’s funny because it’s true” exists for a reason.
I suspect the above is true for a lot of people. I’m always impressed with anyone that can just fill in that top row. The “pants on” block is the icing on the cake.


This Olde Worlde insult:

Fairly sure that these guys regularly get together to make PicknPay No Name Boerewors.

Hence my plan to stick to pizza and beer.

Dear Scam Victim

Solace at last, in the shape of an email from Juliet Joel.

For a bit of background on this story, all you have to do is to remember back to when I was a victim from Scam?
No?
Me neither.

But supposing I had been defrauded, it would all be fine because remittance officer Juliet Joel (you may remember her from SYPNIC BANK BENIN PLC. SCAM COMPENSATION OFFICE DEPARTMENT WORLD BANK/UNITED NATIONS) is here to help:

Screenshot

At first, I was worried that this might also be some sort of scam, but I was immediately reassured by the good names of SYPNIC BANK BENIN PLC. and WORLD BANK/UNITED NATIONS being included therein. After all, it’s highly unlikely that good, proud organisations such as these would be tangled up in any sort of naughtiness. Amiright?

Seems, as they say, legit.

And if there really is $1,500,000.00 USD (One Million Five Hundred Thousand Dollars Only) available and I have been listed/approved for this payment as one of the scammed victims to be paid this amount, then why would I say no? Why would anyone say no? After all, that’s a healthy R21,532,650.00 ZAR (Twenty One Million Five Hundred Thirty Two Thousand Six Hundred Fifty Rand Only) in JZ’s Monopoly money.

I’m already halfway through filling the not ever so taxing form (most difficult bit by miles being the very short field for my address) for further verifications and scan copy of my passport. After all, without them having this information, how can I expect to be fed with further modalities?

It’s a question I know we’ve all asked.

Yep, when it comes to helping Juliet Joel out so that she can help me out, I am there in the manner of an rather keen ursine.

 

I don’t mind telling you that I have a very, VERY good feeling about this.

Meanwhile, in Manchester…

It’s been a good week for Manchester. City won the Premier League and it hasn’t rained every day. But there is a sinister underworld in Manchester which is exploiting the lower than average intelligence of people from… Manchester.

Because:

Greater Manchester Police are investigating a scam in which victims were conned into handing over hundreds of pounds for a bag of potatoes.

The story, which I spotted on BBC News, using the keywords “Manchester”, “Potato” and “Scam”, leaves us tantalisingly short on detail.

Police say at least four people have been approached by two men offering to sell them a laptop or iPhone.

One man paid up to £1,400 and walked away with a rucksack full of potatoes. Other victims received bottles of soft drinks.

Crime, and being a victim of crime, is a terrible thing. It’s in no way a thing to be ridiculed.

Except perhaps, when instead of getting an iPhone for his hard earned £1,400, the victim walks off with a rucksack full of potatoes. Which, it should be noted, would be equally good at displaying Flash content.

How can this have occurred? I can only imagine that there was some sort of hypnotism involved.

You are feeling sleepy…
You are feeling restful and sleepy…
When I click my fingers, you will awaken and believe that this rucksack full of potatoes is an iPhone worth £1,400.

And then, when they get home and the spell wears off, they have to go down to their local police station and report that they thought they were buying an iPhone, but actually, they ended up with a rucksack full of potatoes. And the police have got to keep a straight face. Jeez.

Still, it could be worse, I suppose. They could have ended up with a handful of Blackberry.