Day 187 – Grass

Some gentlemen came and removed all the grass from our back garden today. Gentlemen have been coming around our neighbourhood and removing things quite regularly at the moment, but in this case, it was ok: I did ask them to. These were nice gentlemen.

To be absolutely accurate, there wasn’t very much grass left amongst the plethora of weeds which had taken over after the drought and had successfully outcompeted the lawn ever since.

I know that having a lawn (ironically) isn’t the greenest decision that one can make, but it looks good and is far more conducive to getting the kids outside a bit more than gravel, thorny weeds and succulents. (Incidentally, I’m also aware that having kids isn’t the greenest decision that one can make, but I promise that I won’t have any more. Also, eating fillet steak isn’t the greenest decision that one can make, and certainly I’m not stopping that any time soon. I will, however, continue to religiously recycle. I remain confident that my place in Heaven is assured.)

Long story short, the nice gentlemen are planning to come back and replace the old grass (weeds) with some nice new grass (grass) tomorrow. The beagle (yeah, yeah… having one of which is not the greenest decision etc etc.) will be delighted to have its regular stalking ground back. It’s quite confused about why everything has gone brown and soily outside. Beagles like stability in their lives. And grass.

Hopefully, tomorrow marks the start of a successful, new, picture perfect back garden for the summer and beyond. I’m looking forward to it.

Lawn Status Update

Following a few weeks of growth, and then a few hours of hard work this morning, I am pleased to announce that the lawn status here at Chez 6000 has officially been downgraded from

Oh Christ, we’ve lost the bloody beagle again, to
Could probably do with a cut.

I’m not sure why we chose kikuyu grass for the lawn. It grows like a weed if it’s looked after (i.e. watered) (ours was), but it dies like a dead thing if subjected to partial shade or minor drought. The buffalo on the other lawn (firstly, in this context buffalo is a kind of grass, not a huge mammal (the presence of which would surely negate any mowing anyway (or at least make it far too dangerous to cut the grass)), and secondly, I’m making my garden sounds much, much bigger than it actually is), but anyway, the buffalo on the other lawn is robust and took almost 30 seconds to mow.

Yes, I now realise that the kikuyu was a mistake.
I predict some rebuffalisation in 2015.