RBOSS: IOM and Sheffield

RBOSS continues apace. It was never going to be something that was ever going to stop, but there were (apparently forlorn) hopes that we could at least slow it down.

It seems not. Here’s that statue of the Bee Gees on the Prom in Douglas, now famous for the white line that surrounds the figures of Barry, Robin and Keith:

The statue itself is bad enough. It didn’t need treating to a DEHAZE wash drowning.
And beagle-eyed readers will notice that this one has been used on a calendar. That means that there are at least 28 days (and probably more) when this image is going to be staring at you from your kitchen (or whichever) wall.

Absolute masochism.

And then we head to Sandygate: the oldest football ground in the world, and home to the second oldest football team in the world. But not for much longer, looking at the frankly apocalyptic clouds overhead here:

To be fair, this is less RBOSS and more r/shittyHDR. But the same rules apply.

And there’s absolutely no need for fawning comments like “an amazing capture” or “beautiful [heart emoji]”. Although they are all over this post on Facebook. This image is a record of a visit to a historical, non-league stadium in suburban Sheffield, not some Hurricane Milton lookalike contest.

Remove the ridiculously over-dramatic sky and it’s just perfect at what it’s supposed to be. But now everyone’s looking at the scary clouds and wondering of any of the (somewhat meagre) fanbase survived.

They’ve forgotten that you went to watch the footy.

Completely unjustified.

I know that there are a few people out there who think that these sort of blog posts are wrong, and that art is art. And they’re definitely right on the second bit. But art (is this really “art”?) should also be open to criticism, and when it’s blown out by too many lightroom or snapseed filters or sliders, I will call it out.

Things are often actually quite nice just as they are, and they don’t need stupid amounts of editing just to try and get you a few extra likes or karma points.

RBOSS is back!

It’s been a while since we’ve seen some RBOSS (click here if you need an explanation, and here to see other posts about RBOSS), but it’s back with an absolute classic, a stone-cold banger, a perfect example of the genre. Not least because it’s actually of Ramsey Bay, and that’s the R and the B sorted immediately.

And just look at the O and the S. Wow.

It’s dreamy.

And next up, the photographer’s disclaimer:

not done a lot to it TBH

Ja right.

Of course you haven’t, mate.

The yellow is from your pants that are on fire after that statement.

And all that orange was the early morning nuclear test in Cumbria. A bang so big, it made one end of your photo go down. The Lake District is a whole lot less hilly now, and it’s sloping downhill strongly to the left.

It’s a shame that someone took a video of the same sunrise from about 300m to your left.
And that it looked like this: Ramsey Bay No Saturation Society.

Although you can still see the black smoke from the explosion.

See, that’s how a pro works. No dehaze (see the telltale white haze around the lighthouse on the left above), no silly saturation, straight horizon.

But while it might be more accurate and a whole lot less aggressive on the eyes, it doesn’t get you as many LIKES: the true currency of the RBOSSer.

And that – sadly – is why RBOSS will continue forever.

Video: CJ Wormwell

I missed the moon

Every month seems to bring a different moon thing these days. Sturgeon Moon, Blood Moon, Super Blood Moon, Super Blood Super Moon, Blood Blood Super Blood Strawberry Moon, Buck Moon, Flower Moon, Wolf Moon etc. usw. ens.

We never had those names when I were a lad, and I don’t care if they are the traditional American First Nation nomenclature for them, I don’t want them now either.

As it happens, we got none of this month’s Nonsense Moon down here. The weather was overcast and grey and the moon was merely a bit full when we did catch sight of it through the clouds. But thanks to the power of Facebook and the ubiquity of mobile phone cameras in the Northern Hemisphere, I don’t feel like we missed out at all. Here are some examples from groups in Sheffield, Bergen and the Isle of Man. Special moments, captured specially.

To begin: Deliciously dreamy soft focus over industrial Attercliffe:

“That’s no moon!”. Orange blob over unnamed warehouses:

They’ve #RBOSSed the moon:

Twice. Seriously, this looks like the Teletubbies sun has got the bad jaundice:

I call this one “thanks for sharing”. It could be a streetlight for all we know. Try taking the phone right out of your pocket before grabbing the shot next time:

This is better. It’s like you were actually there. But you forgot to bring your glasses:

Bergen. Norway’s most beautiful city. Home to this 1.3MP potato camera:

And then finally, my favourite. Where the ‘tog has got all the elements (the moon, the shimmering water, the fairytale castle) he or she was after, but feels that it just needs a touch of editing to bring out the best bits – then slips on the dehaze slider and in the process somehow manages to tear through the fabric of time:

Seriously, what on earth happened there?!?

Given the number of images on social media, it’s clear that this month’s full moon was something rather special. It’s also clear that a lot of mobile phone photography has a long way to go before we can reasonably say that it’s worth sharing on social media – or anywhere else.

I… I have no words.

Thanks to the work of the Ramsey Bay Over Saturation Society and their insistence on pumping up the Lightroom sliders to unbelievable levels, we’re now all painfully aware of the #RBOSS phenomenon.

Using software to make shots look better than they actually were is fine. Of course it is. It’s when you go WAAAYYY over the top that it gets silly and ugly and then when you have the audacity to suggest on social media that “it came out of the camera like that”, well, then we’re really heading way down the road of RBOSS wankerdom.
It’s just deceitful karma-harvesting and it pisses me (and a lot of other people) off.
Quite reasonably.

I’m talking about stuff like this, this and this. It even spread to Bergen, which really doesn’t need assistance in looking good in photos.

But all of that (literally) pales into insignificance with what I saw on a Sheffield Facebook group this morning. Because… I mean… even when a sunset is spectacular, you can’t claim that it looked… that it looked… like this:

What in the ever living fishcake has happened here?

This isn’t “Tonight’s sunset over the village” as the protagonist claims. This (I think) used to be Aston on the border of Sheffield. But this isn’t a sunset. This is the actual star crashing into our planet. This is thermonuclear detonation. Billions of megatons of raw explosive power blasting out streams of plasmatic energy across the rolling hills of South Yorkshire. Every atom right across the Western sky exploding in perfect synchronicity, creating an ultra-electromagnetic shockwave that instantly kills everything in its path.

And it’s not helped by comments such as “Absolutely gorgeous!!! [several heart emojis]” or “breathtaking!”. The only breath that’s being taken here is your final one as the blast of hyper-energy – having melted your eyeballs in a nanosecond – sucks the very last molecules of oxygen from your lungs, leaving merely a smouldering pile of desiccated remnants where you once stood.

What makes it impossibly worse is that this guy sells images from his drone. It’s his business. He wants you to pay for this kind of thing. Money. Real money.

To be honest, this is beyond RBOSS. No-one could have known that the technology to over-saturate to these sort of levels even existed. We simply didn’t think it would ever be possible, but this guy has unashamedly gone multi-Sharples.

End times are upon us.

Day 196 – A new challenger approaches

Wandering through that Manx group this morning on Facebook and suddenly was stopped by this:

Technically, this doesn’t count as an RBOSS, because it’s Douglas Bay, not Ramsey Bay.
So this is a DBOSS.

It’s not quite on par with the master’s work, but we’re very much heading that way. And it’s worth noting that there’s no suggestion of that “this is just how it came out of the camera/mobile phone” BS. This is merely overdone and unpleasant, not overdone, unpleasant and untruthful.

But I have to ask – what is it about the East Coast of the Isle of Man that brings the Saturation Slider insanity out in people?

Really. No need.