Day 193 – Never go Full Sharples

We’ve been here before.

My camera doesn’t work the same as Ian Sharples’ camera. My camera produces reasonable, lifelike images, not like the spectacular stuff that “comes straight out of the camera” Chez Sharples.

Stuff like this:

or this:

or this:

Sweet Jesus.

Well, it must be a very special camera. Or a very broken camera. Because sunrises over Ramsey don’t look like this. They often look very nice and very pretty, but they don’t look apocalyptic. I know this because I have friends whose homes overlook Ramsey Bay and who take photos of the sunrises because they look nice and pretty (the sunrises, not necessarily the friends) (shall we park this one right here and move on with the rest of this post?) (yes, we shall).

Their photos don’t look like these ones.

And so we can deduce that the images above are the result of one of three situations:

1. A massive nuclear explosion over England, which lies to the east of the Isle of Man.
2. A massive saturation explosion performed on Ian Sharples’ computer, or
3. A completely unique camera which our protagonist possesses which produces blindingly oversaturated images like these.

The continued existence of England tells us that it’s not number 1. All sense, logic and reason tells us that it’s number 2. But Ian tells us that it’s number 3. So why – apart from the fact that all sense, logic and reason tells us that it’s number 2 – wouldn’t we believe him?

Well, it’s just that he also occasionally takes photos of other things which aren’t blindingly oversaturated. Admittedly, not sunrises, but why would his camera not blindingly oversaturate everything, not just the Ramsey Bay sunrise images he posts for likes on Facebook?

It’s just weird.

My camera doesn’t work the same as Ian Sharples’ camera. My camera produces reasonable, lifelike images. If I want to make images of sunrises or whatever else that look like Ian Sharples’ sunrise images, I have to use software and drag several (or more) of sliders all the way to the right*.

This takes time, so I have created and saved a preset called Half Sharples:

You’ll see that I have a couple of other presets there too: Astro fix, which helps me with images like this one; Project Orange Bright Light fix¬†which assists with photographs taken in and around orchards in the midday Mpumalanga sunshine, and Full Sharples, which I’ve never dared use.

I’m not sure my computer could take it.

There’s simply a limit to the processing power of my laptop. Just as there is a limit to the cerise pixel quotient on my fancy screen. And then there are my eyes. I only have two and they’ve got to last me all my life. Basically, the expense of replacing your motherboard, GPU and monitor, and the medical costs of mending your retinae is simply not worth the risk.
Even if you do want a few more likes on social media.

Save yourself.

Just say no.

Not even once.

Never go Full Sharples.

 

 

* just like he does

Day 150 – Flying things

A quick trip just up the road to Kirstenbosch this morning yielded some decent (by my standards) photos.

Mainly of flying things, it seems.

A pair of Cape Sugarbirds entertained us for a while, flitting between proteas and aloes and there were plenty of Southern and Greater Double-collared Sunbirds around.

And then this little guy, lime green and hidden amongst the lime greenery:

He’s a Forest Canary. He’s rightfully¬†very proud of those eyebrows.

Who wouldn’t be?

And then, as a bit of fun, an exhibit from the Cycads and Dinosaurs exhibition. I’m not a huge fan – I don’t think the gardens need this sort of… “gimmick”(?) – but the little kids love it and I suppose it’s just a one-off thing and it’s educational so [shrug emoji].

The flying dinosaur is very unrealistic, mainly because dinosaurs died out tens of millions of years ago about half the metal used in the sculpture are quite clearly big fat scaffolding poles propping it up into a gliding position.
But take those out with photoshop and apply a bit of a dated filter, and…

… just a bit of fun, but I might try and get a better, more threatening angle next time – difficult because you obviously have to stick to the pathways. (Have a look at one slightly different effort here as well.)

A nice morning out before it got too busy and too non-social distancey. Yes, even in the wide-open spaces of the Botanical Gardens. Back home for a blog post, an afternoon nap and a Sunday evening braai, I think.

And we’re already a third of the way through that already.

[photos here]

Day 110 – Out and about

Right. A shorter, more picturey post today. Not like that behemoth yesterday. So many words.

On Sunday, we headed up to SIlvermine to get some space and winter sunshine ahead of what proved to be quite a fearsome Cape storm.

Vehicular access to the area is still closed, which adds an extra couple of kilometres to your walk, but they were generally nice kilometres and we had some lovely views across the Cape Flats to the snow-capped peaks beyond.

Should have taken my tripod. Didn’t. Oh well. Next time.

Have a look at some photos here.

Still – a great day out and we breathed in all of that fresh air pumped into Cape Town ahead of the cold front.

Day 94 – Wave, daddy!

[Glasto (2) post postponed for the moment, because…]

We went for a drive down the Atlantic Seaboard yesterday. Well… a bit of it, anyway.

Weather like yesterday’s can’t be ignored and we needed the fresh, unsullied air from the ocean.

There was plenty of it to go around, with some frothing chaos on Slangkop beach:

And some grim, stormy seas behind the lighthouse:

It’s always difficult to demonstrate the sheer scale of the seas in photos. So just suffice to say that I was very glad to be on the land and not on the water. Big waves. Big.

The weather was dark, moody and gloomy one minute:

But patchy sunlight scudded across the bay every now and again, giving some occasional delicious light:

 

You can see all the photos (that I felt were worth sharing) from yesterday here.

And you can come back here for that other Glasto-inspired post tomorrow.

Karoo Roadtrip photos

Finally finished the edit on these and got them up onto Flickr. Yay me.

Matjiesfontein – Sutherland – Rietfontein – Barrydale

Weather was good, family was happy, views were forever, fun was had.

The whole set can be found here. Or why not just slideshow here?

Reviews still to follow, because I know you want to know what I thought, right?