Luister Engelsman…

… as jy dit nie hier laaik nie, hoekom gaan jy nie maar terug Engeland toe nie?*

Why do people always ask me that?

So asked a commenter on one of my posts (scroll down to comments – his is the very first).  Normally, I wouldn’t make a big deal out of something said over there. I select posts which I think might be of interest to the bosparra audience and I thought that one fitted the bill. The selection process is more about choosing something topical and South African than choosing something sycophantic. If people don’t agree, well – that prompts (occasionally heated) discussion and that’s fine by me. People must say what they want to. It’s the only way things get sorted. Well, that and rubber bullets.
Also, I must admit that my Afrikaans isn’t all that it might be, which leaves me a little behind when posting on a predominantly Afrikaans site, (although a GCSE in German stands one in surprisingly good stead when it comes to the basic vocabulary).

However, two things changed that plan of (lack of) action in this case. One was the same commenter popping up over here and the other was the point at which I got my basic Afrikaans together and realised exactly what he was moaning about. Either of which would have made him fair game, to be honest… but both together – well…

Yes, My Name is Botha (as in Earl) – let’s call him “MNIB” for short – is upset about… (and here I pause for dramatic effect)… the title of my blog. He whines:

HY impliseer dat ONS nie beskaafd is nie!
(HE is implying that WE aren’t cultured!)

No, I’m not. Unless you’re Australian. Are you Australian?

MNIB has failed to see the heavy sarcasm dripping from every letter of the title. However, rather than lecture me on the good (or civilised) bits of South Africa, he instead goes on the attack – telling me about how my native country is assisting with the destruction of Islam and is at war with the Irish (really?!?).  

So: Luister MNIB – I think I’m more in love with SA than you are. While you can only be negative about the UK (so far as to make up fake wars!), I’ve long been waxing lyrical over how great this country is. About the milk stout, the optimism, the people, the mountains, the spirit, the beaches etc etc.
The title of the site is very much tongue in cheek – when one has seen Oxford’s Blackbird Leys on a Friday night, one could never truly accept the UK as a bastion of civilised behaviour.  

As I said in my reply to your comment – I won’t be changing the name of the site, even if you pay for the rebranding. I honestly can’t see that your suggestion: 9,600 kms from s**t would really attract as many visitors as the now (in)famous 6000 miles… brand does. Also, as I have absolutely no bearing upon the decisions of the British government, which is nearly (but not quite) as barmy as their SA counterparts, I will be unable to prevent them participating in conflicts overseas.

Maybe you’ll actually choose to read a few of the posts on here and you’ll see what I mean. But more likely, I guess you’ll just mutter doos and start whining when I post at bosparra again.

Your choice. But asb… think before you moan.

* “Listen Englishman, since you don’t like it here, why don’t you go back to England?” 

18 thoughts on “Luister Engelsman…

  1. dont get upset over MNIB’s comments. he is famous at bosparra for attacking anyone and everyone.
    in fact, he must be the only person who has never left a positive comment in the whole blogosphere

  2. Hey, easy on the Aussies. I may not be one but I live here… ;-@ (<– does that look like tongue in cheek?)

  3. I’m offended 6000, we Aussies have got great culture, there’s the wool museum in Geelong and footy and …. so much more. (p.s. I tried the cheese grater thing, I didn’t find any part of it amusing)

  4. stephen – I’m not upset. I’m amused!

    delboy – You’ve got to poke fun at the Aussies: “I’ve seen more culture in a pot of yoghurt…” etc etc ;).

    Stan – Sorry, mate. The wool museum, hey? Nice and warm in winter?

  5. It is funny, as soon as people find out you have citizenship of another country they ask what on earth you are still doing here. As if anywhere else is better than here.

    I think people who have the option to go, or who have at least been somewhere else before realise just how special SA actually is.

    Pamela’s last blog post was: Shark free zone! (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  6. What you mean: “real beer”? After all this time here you haven’t yet got used to our own chemically induced variety of the holy hobbs? Come on, man! I thought you were natrulised 😉 You can also try the lager from our neighbor Namibia: Tafel Lager!

    Nice post – but I would not take MNIB seriously. He is a moraliser who seeks to impose on everyone else his timid conception of morality – in a fair way he/she is hater of anyone who thinks differently to him. I guess the meaning of Alexander Chase’s words would be lost on him: “The peak of tolerance is most readily achieved by those who are not burdened with convictions.”

    We were all blessed with his omnipotent presence at one time or another.

    Emil’s last blog post was: Poverty (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  7. It’s rather sad how a nation of Moaning Minnies takes such offense at reasonable criticism and their response is always the same “Go back to where you came from!” Does that signify that they are just naturally xenophobic and want any “non-burgher” to leave or is it that they are at a loss for words (civil ones that is)so resort to rudeness. For the record, I am a South African citizen because my grandparents decided to stay anyway!

    charmskool’s last blog post was: The sublime and the gorblimey (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  8. @charmskool: Comment from Emil which I accidentally deleted – sorry Emil!

    “Charmskool, don’t confuse this one “Moaning Minnie” with the rest of us. Your “they” is very inclusive and a gross generalisation. I, for one, am not xenophobic. Some of my best friends are foreigners ”

    Emil’s last blog post was: Poverty (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  9. 896(!) word essay which began:
    “Kom hier, LAAIMIE, sit en luister….”

    and the rest of which I deleted. Ag shame.
    **EDITED by 6000**

  10. Dear Mr 6000

    On 2008-05-26 12:27:21 you said at

    “But I can like to say what I want when I’m writing about SA. Really. Read the Constitution.”

    I hereby extend a hand of co-operation and offer to edit the post you deleted this morning.

    Kindly mail your complaint(s) to and I will send you a revised post.

    Please consider and accept my offer — It is the right thing to do.

  11. @My name is Botha (as in Earl): Oh hello. Are you still here?
    Thanks for your offer.

    And… er… no. Thanks anyway.

  12. 6k, don’t worry about it. By and large, the Afrikaners are the nicest, most hospitable people on the planet.

    There are some who seem to think that they are still fighting the Boer War, they aren’t worth bothering with.

    When I did National Service, we used to wind them up (we being of those distinctly British heritage) by saying “At least I know that my grandmother was white) – then run for it.

    Henry Crun’s last blog post was: Couldn’t Have Said It Better Myself (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  13. Yea Henry

    *rest of comment deleted by accident*


    Leave a Reply