I’ve checked, and it’s not April 1st. So colour me confused…
Lewis Group is probably best known for the business of selling furniture, although most of its revenue actually comes from the credit side of the business of selling furniture. As an aside, that side of their business has not always had the best press.
Selling credit is both a profitable and a risky business. When things are good, the rewards are plentiful. When things are bad, the rewards are still plentiful, but they’re harder to get at and you make a lot of people’s lives hell while getting at them (the rewards and the people).
Maybe you need to diversify. Have a secondary line of business far detached from furniture, appliances and
ripping poor people off selling expensive credit.
So, it’s either making Thneads or Essay writing. And a thnead is a thing that everyone needs, but then loads of people need essays writing too, because they simply don’t have the time or ability to do it themselves. So – given the absence of local Truffula trees – it’s the latter option that Lewis Group has taken. And this is how they told us about it:
February 9, 2016
We allow a large number of learners all around the English-speaking community struggling with time or have difficulties completing their tailor made essays, coursework, research papers, thesis, or maybe even dissertation. If you are exploring for your powerful and concise academic paper or a custom essay that is certainly created to fit your wants then you definately have found the appropriate area. We’ve been the most veteran essay-writing services and thoroughly warranty your fulfillment.
I’d guess that about 75% of my time at university was spent exploring for my powerful and concise academic paper. Definately [sic]. And who doesn’t want their fulfillment [sic] thoroughly warrantied?
Exactly. Everyone wants their fulfillment [sic] thoroughly warrantied.
So it’s all good. And so, they continue:
The original essays that you may get the following are accomplished by tailor made essay writers and researchers, who’ve professional and post-graduate degrees in the area of specialization that you desire. Acquiring the devoted assist of the experienced essay writer and researcher will make the many big difference in your own personalized essay. If you’re getting a trouble using your educational essay-writing then you shouldn’t allow your grades experience by not finishing the assignment or publishing a half-finished analysis paper or essay.
Well done for acquiring the devoted assist. That will indeed make the many big difference. I’m certainly not getting a trouble with that, although there is some sort of nagging doubt about something I just can’t put my finger on right now.
But wait; there’s more:
Any Published Undertaking, Regardless how Difficult
We are below that will help you with even your most complex composing assignments. The confirmed competence of our certified essay writers can effectively protect all sectors of scholarly examine in close to any issue place. Our essay creating service may help you once you demand to sort a descriptive or persuasive essay to a complicated investigate paper with the doctoral level.
Did you get that? They are below that will help you. And it’s that kind of thing that can protect all sectors of scholarly in close to any issue place. This is big stuff, because a lot of less professional essay writing outfits only protect a few sectors of scholarly in close to any issue place. That’s why you’re going to be paying these guys the big bucks for a complicated investigate paper with the doctoral level.
I could go on – because they do. And while I’m still not sure if this is real (spoiler: I do know that it’s just a hack), I do know that (currently), it’s really on their site:
And, just in case it does go missing, I’ve sensibly PDF’d the whole page for your reading pleasure.
As a press release, it’s fairly informative, but as an advert for the quality of the service you can expect from their new venture, it’s utterly spectacular.