Your Headline Of The Day

Thanks to the Cambridge News for this one. If you thought that nothing ever happened in Cambridge apart from posh students doing posh studenty things, then you’d be nearly correct. Phillip Emery tried to change all that though, and in doing so, gave his local newspaper the opportunity to pen this headline:

‘Shotgun’ man with blowtorch and gas canister threatened to blow up officers after eating cheese with large knife, Cambridge Crown Court told

And how did they arrive at this headline? Well, because:

Officers arrived at Phillip Emery’s home following a call from his landlord to find him eating cheese with a large knife sat next to a blowtorch and gas canister.

Fantastic. Could Emery be the Cambridge equivalent of Wallace?
“Cracking Wensleydale, Gromit! Nice big knife, too! Now, shall we blow some coppers up?”

And having been separated from his potentially lethal gas canister by the brave officers of the law, Emery:

…then threatened to blow up the house using the gas supply, even though it did not have one.

Go on then, mate! That should be worth watching.

I am well aware that cheese is meant to give you nightmares, but I think in this case, Emery’s unusual behaviour can probably be put down to the drugs that he had been taking earlier in the evening.

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