Eating on the run

This post dedicated to Nix-Grim, who can (hopefully) now relax for at least a couple of weeks.

One of the benefit [sic] of our current Medical Aid is the Discovery HealthyFood™ programme, whereby members can get up to 25% off healthy foodstuffs bought at Pick n Pay supermarkets. I feel better because I’m healthier and saving money, Discovery feel better because I’m healthier and claiming less money from them and Pick n Pay feel better because I go there to buy my fruit and veg with 25% off and take the opportunity stock up on curry and chocolate while I’m at it.
So everyone’s happy.

As part of the enrollment for this ground-breaking new initiative, I was forced requested to fill in a Personal Health Review which covered everything from Smoking (I don’t), through Drinking (I do) and Stress (I am) to Physical activity (chance would be a fine thing). Prospective answers for each question were given from a drop-down menu, like this example from the stress section:


Do I eat on the run? Well, not if I can help it, but sometimes it’s either that or nothing. So never is right out, but I certainly don’t do it daily either.
Which leaves me with “a few times a week” or “1-3 times a year”. Because let’s be clear, there can be no middle ground in the eating on the run scenario. Either you are a serial on the run eater*, eating on the run a few times a week or you eat on the run 1-3 times a year. Not four, not five: one to three.
That’s why, the first time you eat on the run each year (probably mid January, I’m guessing), you have to make the big decision – are you going to do it again a few times that week or are you going to limit yourself to next eating on the run only in July and then again once more in September? That’s a big ask, believe me.

Suddenly the mass fainting episodes at schools in KZN are explained. This isn’t a case of witchcraft, nor pollution, nor drugs. This is  an example of what happens when you foolishly take the 1-3 times a year option and then use up all your eating on the run opportunities by the first week in February. You go hungry and you faint.

Safer then, to do as I did, risk the wrath of your Medical Aid and tell them you eat on the run most days. Of course, in doing this, I suggest that I lead a high-stress lifestyle which puts me at greater risk of all sorts of nasty disorders and they told me that they’re pretty unhappy with me because of that.
A heated argument ensued over the phone, with Discovery threatening to increase my monthly premiums unless I cut back and only ate on the run 1-3 times a year. In the end, blood pressure sky-high and anxiety levels through the roof after a full-on 20 minute row with the dear Boitshepo in the Johannesburg call centre, I gave in and promised to eat on the run less often.
(She was ever so forceful.)

I put the phone down and had to have 4 beers and slab of chocolate to get over the stress of the whole situation.

* Note that this is different from eating cereal on the run.

9 thoughts on “Eating on the run

  1. Wow, that is annoying. Apparently being truthful (or whatever) is also bad for your health. Clearly, though, you have an effective strategy for dealing with stress. But I think a bottle of red wine probably has more of those healthful tannins or whatever it is that contributes to “heart health”. I’d switch if I were you.

    expateek´s last blog post was: My Name is Sybil (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

  2. Eating on the run? I found that you spill stuff.

    So I just* gave up running.

    *”Just” is a time-exaggeration. It wasn’t really that recent.

  3. Po > You eat pot plants? Is that what they teach you in your basement in Oxford?

    GaiB > Try more solid foodstuffs. Chocolate seems to be a favourite with everyone in SA.

  4. Damm – so it was a trick question! I said a few times a week, generally on my long run when I go over 25km. Is that not what they meant????

  5. OL (& others) > Just a quick reminder that for distances over 500m (or 1km if you’re super fit like me) a thing called a car has been invented. This information has yet to reach (and revolutionise) PE.

  6. Hey – we are advancing. Something called the “wheel” has just rolled into town. There is huge excitement.

    Ordinarylife´s last blog post was: Creature of habit? (Note: 6000 miles… is not responsible for the content of external internet sites)

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