Pointless Pointing

HELLO POINTER POINTER! GOODBYE PRODUCTIVITY!

Bad news if you wanted to get anything worthwhile done this morning – here’s Pointer Pointer.

No real… er… point to this, but putting it in a nutshell, plonk your cursor somewhere on the screen and within a couple of seconds, a photo of an (often drunk) individual or individuals will appear, pointing at your pointer.

Give it a go. Top left is my particular favourite so far.

point

…but I’m sure there are literally hundreds of others to discover, so I’m going to get back to discovering them right now.

Go play.

Astronaut problems

I have no idea of the veracity of this*, but I think it’s great anyway.
Gravity wins again:

hadfield

Hadfield returned to earth this week after 146 days in space on board the ISS. And while there were other astronauts up there with him, he was the one who kept us updated with the goings on aboard the vessel and gave us brilliant pictures like this.

* actually, now I do. Real tweet, but not the real man. 🙁

That other departmental concert warning

The Western Cape Education Department’s warning that children must not miss school simply because they are going to see (or have seen) the Justin Bieber concert in Cape Town on Wednesday evening has been widely circulated.

Paddy Attwell, WCED spokesman, said that the Education Department had no problem with kids attending the concerts but if any students chose to miss school, they would be dealt with internally based on the individual school’s code of conduct.

A crowd of around 50,000 is expected and many of them will be children, so it could be that Paddy et al will have their work cut out for them.

However, less well publicised was the similar warning from another Western Cape Department regarding the Bon Jovi concert on Tuesday evening at the Cape Town Stadium. We’re here to put that right.

The Western Cape Department of Geriatric Affairs has become aware of many requests to Old Age, Frail Care and Retirement facilities across the province regarding the temporary removal of patients and residents from facilities ahead of the upcoming Bon Jovi concert at Cape Town Stadium, Tuesday 7th May 2013.

We are aware that due to the nature of this concert and the artists playing, the uptake from our patients and residents will be high.

While the Department appreciates the efforts of the families and friends of patients taking them to cultural experiences, it should be noted that guardians should remember that due to their advanced age, patients and residents may experience confusion, bewilderment and/or death as a result of the excitement of seeing one of the great rock bands of 30 years ago.
However, those persons responsible for the elderly should please remind their charges that this is no longer the 1980s and that their cardiovascular systems, joints and energy levels will have diminished significantly since that decade.

Extra paramedics,resuscitation  equipment, defibrillators and frail care facilities are being laid on at the Stadium to cater for the those of advanced age who are expected to make up the majority of the audience for this concert.

In addition, we are aware of plans to take many Zimmer frames from our facilities for a promised special version of the song “Wanted, Dead or Alive” featuring the line “I’m a cowboy, on a steel frame I walk”. Residents and patients are reminded that removal of Departmental equipment from our premises is not permitted and will not be tolerated even in these exceptional circumstances.

The Department wishes everyone a safe and enjoyable experience on Tuesday evening and looks forward to seeing all their patients and residents back for a nice cup of tea and some biscuits on Wednesday morning. Shall we say 10ish?

Lovely.

Rock on…

Roofing

WARNING: Just… well… look, you’ll see.

Nuts. That’s what these people are. They’re just like those French okes hanging off that crane in Paris, and that almost made people lose their lunches.

Je te presente Roofing – that is, climbing up to high places and taking photos and videos.

Says Vadim Mahorov:

I decided this was my thing.
This is what I wanted to do.

Well, you go ahead and do it Vadim, but don’t come crying to me when you end up falling tens of thousands of feet (really? – Ed.) and landing on a notoriously solid pavement in Vladivostok.

Vertigo… oh… OH MY GOD!

You too will catch your breath at 4:23. Ugh.

Their photography is amazing, I don’t deny that. But is it really worth the risk and is it really, really worth the risk of doing it in winter when there’s snow everywhere? I spent my childhood in Sheffield, living on a very steep hill and I have to be honest, despite the incline, cars never had an issue getting up the hill unless there was snow on it. Snow is slippery. It denies you grip, traction. It’s not something that you want to have between your footwear and whatever surface you are on, notably so when there’s a MASSIVE drop onto the streets below just… there.

The main risk of roofing is to fall down. You need to be very careful.

Vadim tells us, noting also that the Pope is Catholic and that bears have been known to shit in the woods.

Thanks Vadim. The next time I am hanging off the top of an icy building in Germany, I’ll be sure that I watch my footing. Or maybe I’ll cut out the middle man altogether and just NOT GO ONTO THE SLIPPERY ROOF OF A SKYSCRAPER IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Now, I’m off to dry my palms and grab a brandy to steady my nerves.