Cape Party want to turn the Cape into France Shock!

Possibly, anyway.

If you’re from these parts, you’ll have no doubt seen the Cape Party’s election boards on streetlights all over Cape Town. They got them up early, presumably to catch those voters who, rather than making their decisions on party policies, manifestos and the like, thought “I know, I’ll vote for the first party whose election boards I see on the streetlights on my way home this evening.”
It’s like taxi companies who try to be first in the Yellow Pages by calling themselves “A1 Taxis” or “AAA Cars” in the hope that you’ll pick them because they are top of the list. I have a deep mistrust of these companies – what are they trying to hide? Would booking with a taxi company with a name beginning further down the alphabet really be a worse option for my travelling requirements? Why?

But back to the Cape Party and their early-bird advertising tactics. It’s a small number of voters that will be influenced in this way, but then the Cape Party appears to be a party of small numbers anyway.

So why should we be bothered about them at all? Well, the Cape Party wants the Cape Provinces to become independent, becoming a new country: The Cape Republic.

The Cape Party will return the Cape to its rightful independence and once and for all bring an end to the racism and oppression suffered under this colonial Union.

Which sounds “ok”, I guess.
And their manifesto lists several reasons why this would work, including some recent “successful examples”:

…we have a long history of not being a part of South Africa. Many people believe that South Africa has passed the tipping point and that Independence for the Cape is the only viable solution.
Successful examples:  former USSR (15 countries), Yugoslavia (7 Countries), Czechoslavakia [sic] (2 countries) and the peaceful secession of South Sudan only a month ago.

They do seem to be ignoring conflicts in Georgia, the ongoing crisis in Chechnya and the tiny, almost insignificant Yugoslav wars of the 1990s (conservative estimates of 120,000 deaths). There was violence before, during and after the Sudanese referendum.
Dividing up Czechoslovakia seemed to go quite well though. Let’s hope that the Cape can follow that road to independent governance rather than any of those other “successful” examples, hey?

But their blatant glossing over of the truth behind what actually happened when those countries went their separate ways is not my real issue with these guys: after all, the definition of success is subjective. My real problem is the fact that they are secretly trying to turn the Cape into France. Check the party emblem and compare the shape of the new Cape Republic to… France:

OK, Normandy is a bit out of proportion, but that Southern coast looks dangerously familiar.

It was because of this concerning similarity that I looked into the Cape Party in greater detail. And look what I found as the very first line in their Vision for The Cape Republic:

The Cape Republic is roughly the size of France

Oh – isn’t that convenient???

So we look like France and we’re about the same size as France. Now all that is needed is an hatred of the British because you once lost a war to them.

The selfish motives of politicians a political system that is as racially divisive and oppressive as the others that have plagued this land since the British Empire forced the Union of South Africa upon us in 1910…


Further evidence: constant references to Cape Provence and suggested adoption of the Swiss system of voting – a country where they speak French and which borders France.  In addition, the Cape Party headquarters is in Franschhoek. Need I say more, except for informing you that I actually made this last bit up – they’re actually based in Claremont. Which sounds very much like Clermont-Ferrand, which is in France.

The Cape Party manifesto ends with this quote from Mahatma Ghandi:

First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight you. Then you win.

Look, I’m already well into stage two, but more fool them for revealing their modus operandi as I have no plans to go any further, breaking the chain and thus ruining any chances of them winning anything ever.
And that is a good thing, because turning into France is no decent future for us.
Or anyone else for that matter.

Good People of the Cape, while it may improve the overall quality of the cuisine in this corner of Africa, this is scant reward for the annoying accents, dismissive arrogance, constant and overwhelming scent of garlic and terrifyingly bizarre toilet habits which we will be forced to endure if the Cape Party ever get their way for this little bit of Europe. You have been warned.

94 thoughts on “Cape Party want to turn the Cape into France Shock!

  1. Oh, and BTW, I hear Scotland will probably opt for Independence, so I guess UK is not the Utopian paradise your heading suggests..

  2. Andre > So why the “no more ANC” posters? Will the ANC be allowed to stand in an Independent Cape? Will the Cape Party dare to allow that freedom?

    CAPE REBELS > Many thanks for the exciting and incisive cut and paste work. Top marks.

    John M Riggs > If you are going to keep posting on here, please MAKE sure you don’t use the same STYLE each time. You are as see-through as a clean window.

    stickman > Some very valid questions. I have seen no valid answers forthcoming.

    Walter Laurie > In answer to your first comment, no. Not at all. And growing from what? It’s their first election. If you mean “they are getting more than zero votes”, well – maybe. But only just.
    In answer to your second: well done. It’s a good spot. I keep thinking that I should put a huge banner at the top of each and every page with some sort of descriptive design on to assist people with realising this.
    I’ll get round to it soon.
    Credibility? Not sure why I don’t have credibility as far as you’re concerned? More xenophobic Cape Party tendencies?
    So, if Scotland goes for independence, do you feel this will really make the rest of the UK less civilised?

  3. I’d just like to respond to Andre (I think) re if its economically viable for the Cape to become independent:

    It is not economically viable for the cape to become independent.

    Before you start pasting things from the site again, I have read all of it. Yes, its unfounded and naïve but I still read it. Let’s just ask this important question: How does the Cape party propose we approach this independence ?
    After they win a referendum with more than 50 percent of the vote how do the plan on setting up an independent state with its own government structures, army and the other things you need when starting a country.

    Are you going to put up fences? Who is going to stay and who will leave ?

    What will you do first ?

    Remember the remarketing exercise SA had after 1994 and how long that took.

    These are the things that I want to read about on your website. Not things like how much the ANC suck or how useless the DA are.

    Honestly if the Cape Party get more than 1% of the votes ill eat my hat.

  4. Walter:> I liked your comment about 6000’s britishness. The 6000 miles and the two flags on the page banner says it all. He told me to move to France to save my butt but he clearly has one foot still stuck in briton and yet wants to preach to us. No commitment ! Bet he got a british passport as well.

  5. Craig G > “These are the things I want to read about on your website.”
    Those are the things they can’t answer.

    Chris du Plessis > I didn’t tell you to move to France. I suggested it as an alternative for when the Cape Party don’t get any votes.
    Jeez – you give people helpful advice and they get all uppity.
    And yes, I do have a British passport, because, I’m… British. Strange that.
    That said, pretty soon, I’ll have an SA passport as my citizenship application is working its way through the channels of Government.

    No commitment, what?

  6. “In answer to your first comment, no. Not at all. And growing from what? It’s their first election. If you mean “they are getting more than zero votes”, well – maybe. But only just.”

    Were you in the UK last time round we had provincial elections?
    Also, on what ground do you judge the CP’s growth?

    “In answer to your second: well done. It’s a good spot. I keep thinking that I should put a huge banner at the top of each and every page with some sort of descriptive design on to assist people with realising this.
    I’ll get round to it soon.
    Credibility? Not sure why I don’t have credibility as far as you’re concerned? More xenophobic Cape Party tendencies?”

    I find your name for this blog slightly condescending, hence my statement. Its always interesting to meet someone that can dish it out, but cant take it. As someone who seemingly writes in Jest, you get quite perturbed when not everyone is laughing with you? Dont get me wrong, I think its good that your asking questions – just remember that we who were born here and who love the Cape talk about her Independence with sincerity – we are talking about our home and its future…

    “So, if Scotland goes for independence, do you feel this will really make the rest of the UK less civilised?
    Really?” I was questioning your motives. If you did indeed argue that the Western Cape should not be seeking Independence, (which i gathered from your article,) im guessing that you would also not be in favor of Scottish Independence, as secession is clearly for the loonies? (in your world..)

  7. Walter Laurie > Walter, you make an awful lot of assumptions and generalisations.
    My first question would be – why are you still reading this incredible blog? (Although we may be using the word “incredible” from different standpoints). You question my credibility yet you keep on coming back and wanting more from me. Why is that?

    You state that “we who were born here and who love the Cape talk about her Independence with sincerity – we are talking about our home and its future…”, but that doesn’t hold (anywhere near) true for ANY of the born & bred Cape residents that I have spoken to. Seriously, not a single one of them talks about “her Independence” with sincerity – they all think it’s a very silly idea. Whilst accepting that we obviously, thankfully mix in different circles, this 100% dichotomy surprises me – you too?

    Scotland’s independence vote is completely different from the Cape’s. The biggest difference is that (especially with the SNPs recent success), it may actually happen. But if it does, it will be based on sound and tested economic grounds. Not on what appear to be some rudimentary back-of-a-cigarette-packet-in-the-back-room-of-Fireman’s-at-two-in-the-morning calculations.

    Secession isn’t for the loonies per se. The idea of secession for the Cape, however, seems to be.

  8. *puts hand up* I’m someone who’s a born and bred Capetonian, and have lived here for all my life…


    The Cape Party should seriously consider moving their headquarters to a little place called Valkenberg. I hear they’ve got some really comfortable offices there, the sort where if you’re having a bad day you can hurl yourself at a wall and not get hurt.

    Seriously, if anyone from the Cape Party thinks that the Western Cape can survive on it’s own without the rest of South Africa is severely deceiving itself. We’ve got no natural resources, our major industries are subsidiaries of national companies (for the most part), basically we’ve got Tourism and a couple of wine farms to sustain us.

    And the biggest failing the Cape Party have? This is a local government election. Sure, if they were campaigning to make Cape TOWN independent they may have had some credibility. But to have the whole Western Cape bail on South Africa they’d have to win more than just Cape Town. And even then Aunty Helen would have a thing or two to say about them stealing her province out from under her.

    Bottom line? Go make those enquiries at Valkenberg.

  9. @Walter… my hat is ready and waiting.

    Its a blitong hat nevertheless and I might eat it anyway but my comment stands.

  10. “Scotland’s independence vote is completely different from the Cape’s. The biggest difference is that (especially with the SNPs recent success), it may actually happen. ”

    Isn’t the biggest difference the fact that Scotland is actually a country.

  11. @Craig G.
    There are many countries that are very small with very view natural resources that are very successful. eg. taiwan, Japan, isreal, Iceland to name a few. It is all about human ingenuity and the will to make a success.
    Despite vast natural resources, Africa totally sucks in economic growth because its human content is useless.
    This country has reached first world economic capacity because the right people made it happen.
    We will do it again, in the independent Cape, because we can.
    And besides that, their is nothing that stops us trading with our neighbors or any one else. It will be just a matter of time before neighbouring countries que-up to make use of our expertise to help them develop their economies.

  12. Gary > Thanks for your thoughts.

    Craig G > Mmm…. Biltong hat…

    Pamela > And has some sort of viability.

    John M Riggs > Your comment was deleted as it did not comply with the terms and conditions listed here.
    Should you be unsure as to why your comment was deleted, please feel free to contact me using the link on that page.

    Chris du Plessis > So you imply that the Cape has limited natural resources, and that the human content of Africa sucks, but you expect an independent Cape to succeed “because we can”?
    Do me a favour, Chris. Step back, pretend for a moment that you are objective over this issue and look at what you’ve written.
    Would you be convinced? Honestly?
    I’m not even convinced that you would be convinced, let alone that you could convince anyone else to be convinced.

  13. @Chris du Plessis – You mention countries that have limited natural resources and are successful and you decided to use Iceland as an example? Are you trying to kill your argument or are we talking about different Icelands?
    The same Iceland that was one of the first to enter recession during the latest global financial crisis?

    @6000 – I really want to unsubscribe from these comments because they are jamming up my inbox, but they are so damn entertaining!

  14. @RichardAtUCT

    “I really want to unsubscribe from these comments because they are jamming up my inbox, but they are so damn entertaining!”

    There are some phenomenal individuals on this thread.

    On the subject of Iceland, Japan, Taiwan, Singapore, and other “small success stories” (incl. Hong kong), there seems to be a common theme emerging. Hmmm, now what could it be?

    Oh, yes! They are ISLANDS!*

    Of course, we could overcome this (one) unfortunate geographical limitation by building a gigantic moat around the Western Cape. That way, we can ensure both island status and keep out those pesky gingers!

    Two birds, one stone!

    Cape Party affiliates… I’m here to solve your remaining policy loopholes. Call me.

    * I apologise in advance for joining the caps lock fringe.

  15. By the way, for all those talking up Scotland’s imminent departure from the rest of the British union… May I suggest an article from this week’s Economist?

    There’s a nice chart showing that support for Scottish Independence currently stands at under 30%…
    (Though, having said that, I endorse @Pamela’s shocking(!) – for some – insight above that the Scottish case might be slightly different as it is an actual country already.)

  16. @Richard-> Is that all you can think of. Fact is they made something out of nothing using their skills, and their bubble burst when the US went bankrupt, just like the rest of the world. So whats new.

  17. Chris du Plessis > Yeah, Richard. Stop focusing on the minutia like economic viability.
    Interestingly, South Africa remained pretty much untouched when the rest of the world went bang. Probably best to stick with JZ et al for when the next dip comes.

  18. Fact is: we DO have an Independence movement for the Western Cape – had you been able to vote today you would have seen us on the ballots. And we may be small, but we ARE growing.

    Im not saying this to P you off, its a fact. And maybe one day, if SA ever destroys itself, (and there is every reason to suggest that this may happen,) you might have wished that the Western Cape did seek SOME sort of self-rule. Centralised power – especially in Africa is dangerous. I suggest you pay a visit to Limpopo (or any other part of SA outside the Cape,) and talk to people there of all the farm murders and crime that are not only rampant, but seemingly encouraged by an ever authoritarian ANC government. I have family there, do you? Will you really be surprised if the ANC one day decide to scrap the provinces altogether?

    Also, if you guys are gonna talk economics, id encourage you to look at GDP growth per province: the Western Cape continues to out-perform national growth EVERY time, Cape Town IS the safest and best run city.

  19. It would be cool if Cape Town was an Island though… I wonder if we could have a referendum about that.

  20. Why are THEY still doing THIS for emphasis?!

    So we he is up for starting a NEW political party? The Island Party?!
    I’m sure @Craig G and @stickman would be our founding members. i’ll take the pictures for the campaign posters! What do you think?

    I mean who wouldn’t vote for that guy? I am THAT talented!
    @6000 we will make you a citizen as soon as we are in power if you campaign for us on your blog, k?

  21. @Walter

    FACT: You now have an independence counter movement, and its already flipping huge.

    Rampant farm murders and land grabs endorsed by the ANC ? Oh wow… are we going there ? Hang on let me get my ” Uhuru is naai ” T-shirt.

    The ANC might want to get rid of the provinces but voting for the Cape Party wont stop that, besides when land grabs do become a reality do you think that the Cape will be able to fend it off all by its self ?

  22. Fek.. can’t edit my commments.

    Walter that point about the GDP being out performed is being debunked every time you bring it up, so rather just get some different data.

    CT is largely reliant on the economics of the other provinces (Mainly GP), the data us also skewed because people come to CT to spend their money.

  23. Craig G > You must see the racist crap and “boere genocide” links I am having to delete to keep this comment thread even vaguely on topic/decent/free of nutters.
    I have had to delete over 40 comments because of their offensive content. If elections were judged on pure racism, the Cape Party and its followers would be running this country/province/independent homeland now.

  24. @6000. -> Yeah, well,” boer genocide” and ‘All that racist crap’ that you refuse on this web page. Including mine. Pretty obvious that you that you wont allow comments that does not fit in your skewed set liberal world with no space for free thinking.
    No need to comment. I wont waste anymore time on your cramped web space.

  25. Chris du Plessis > With due respect, Chris, you can’t see what I can see on the back end of the blog. So please don’t judge.
    For the record, before this post, I had edited or refused a total of 7 comments versus the 7,319 I approved. That (as I’m sure you can work out) amounts to less than 0.01%.
    You have probably seen tiny percentages before, but you may think of them as “a significant and growing figure”.
    The comments I have deleted on this post have all been from one IP address (now blacklisted) and broke one (or more) of the terms and conditions for commenting on this blog.

    Not my fault that people refuse to read.

  26. Well this has been fun.

    Just so you guys don’t feel bad, i’ll eat my hat anyway.

    … see you in 2014 ! (Unless genocide kills us all)

  27. Results to date (not finalised so subject to change):

    The Cape Party received 1347 votes for Ward Councillors (or 0.14% of the vote), which sadly (for them) means that they’re not going to win any wards this time. They received 1283 votes for proportional representation (or 0.13% of the vote), again, not enough to get a seat in Council. I’d like to hear the reasoning they come up with for the lesser number of votes for the PR ballot. Some of their supporters clearly aren’t all that keen for the party as such to rule, but are ok with the Councillor nominee, which I guess is something.

    If I may offer them some marketing advice, they may get some mileage out of the fact that they got a similar number of votes to the IFP in Cape Town. Although, no, that probably isn’t too much to shout about given the historical performance of that party in these parts, and the performance of that party nationally in this election.

    It’s also quite hard to verify the claim that they’re growing, seeing as how this is the first election they’re actually participating in. I guess we’ll have to wait for 2014 to actually see if there’s any truth to it.

  28. Someone famous once said “I have a dream” …. let the have their “pipe”dream.

    This “party” is like Marmite – love it or hate it, nothing in the middle.

    “Vision” is understood.
    Concept is unrealistic.
    Motivation ? Who cares.
    Hidden agenda ? Doubt it.

    Could it work – NEVER !
    Would it work – NEVER !

  29. The idea of the Cape of Good Hope becoming independent and the method of regaining our once freedom is growing by the day. The news media and TV media have decided to block us from appearing in their news papers as well as on TV, but what they do not recon with is there are many other means of telling/getting our story over to the people of the Cape. Both the DA/ANC are not from the Cape and are using us for their own political agenda’s which they think people of the Cape will keep voting for them who offer food parcels just before every election. They both are discriminating against us in one way or another. Just take BBE, we already see how these big businesses are not employing Capetonians, but instead people from the Eastern Cape who have the Transkei and the whole Eastern Cape, look at who are getting most of the houses been built in the Cape. If ever there was a case of discrimination it is against us now by the DA/ANC who do not lift one finger to help us. We are not blind we can see what is happening. Our message is we want our independence so DA/ANC please be so kind and remove yourselves from the Cape and give us our freedom. You got yours now you deny us the right to ours. Stop been selfish you have most of the country anyway !!!!

  30. Lourens > And I suppose the IEC manipulated the results in the last election too then? You know, the one when the Cape Party got 0.9% of the vote?
    Don’t lie to my readers – your support is virtually non-existent.

  31. Why do you not get your facts straight. You are oviously a DA liberal supporter and totally uninformed as to what went on in the Cape of Good Hope during the last elections and what is happening on the ground now. Lots of unlawful things went on and PLEASE DO NOT SHOW YOURSELF AS A CLOWN WHO CALLS OTHERS LIARS, AND WILL NOT EVEN GIVE HIS NAME, BUT HIDES BEHIND A BABY. PERHAPS YOU ARE A BABY!!! We are aware of how many votes we got and are not affraid to tell people the numbers. Its you that wants to misinform the Cape people by telling them that the Cape Party want to turn the Cape into a sort of France when in fact nothing can be further from the truth. Stop talking nonsense and get a life !!!!!

  32. Lourens, I suppose your complaint (with accompanying evidence) was then dismissed/ignored by IEC also? I knew the lizards controlled Absa, but didn’t realise they’d infiltrated the IEC also. Scary days.

  33. Now that the Western Cape is burning, I wonder if all these anti-Cape Independence people here still feel the same way?

  34. Walter > Veld fires can occur in any province, Walter. In the frankly unthinkable event that you ever gain control of the Western Cape, are you going to outlaw veld fires? Do you have any idea as to why Grand Empress Zille has yet to take this blindingly obvious step?

    Leave a Reply